November 23, 2018

"I'm home," Shinji said.
Asuka looked up from her manga as Shinji entered the apartment. "Welcome home," she said.
Shinji dropped his backpack by the door, then shuffled into the living room. He crossed to within a few feet of her, then slumped to the floor, back to the wall.
She frowned. "How was therapy?" she asked.
He shrugged.
"Not good, huh?" she said.
It took a few moments for Shinji to answer. "We talked about Kaworu," he said.
"Who?" she asked. Then she nodded and said, "Oh, right. Homo-boy."
Shinji scowled at her. "Don't call him that!" he snapped.
Asuka flinched, startled. "What's your problem?" she fired back.
"He was my friend!" he said. "Don't make fun of him like that."
"Don't be stupid," she said. "He was an Angel, he--"
"I don't care!" Shinji yelled.
She opened her mouth, ready to chew him out, but she held her tongue.
"It doesn't matter," he went on, his voice subdued. "If he was my friend, he died, and you shouldn't talk about him like that." He swallowed thickly. "And if he wasn't, if he was my enemy, he . . . hurt me." His voice was shaking now; he was on the verge of tears.
Asuka's lip curled, a mixture of sympathy and disgust marring her pretty features. She stared at him for a moment, then blew out a breath, deciding the argument wasn't worth the effort. "Whatever," she mumbled.
Shinji ground the heel of his palm against his forehead, forgetting about her for the moment. Asuka frowned, then sighed. She stood and made her way to the kitchen. She opened the refrigerator and retrieved a plate of rice balls, then returned to Shinji's side and sat down, placing the plate between them. She picked up a rice ball and held it out to him. "Here," she said.
Shinji blinked in surprise, then accepted the snack. "Th . . . thank you," he stammered.
She shrugged. As he started to eat she said, "I bought some stuff at the store today, fixings for stir fry. I'll make some later."
Shinji shook his head. "You don't have to," he said. "I can--"
"Stupid Shinji!" she spat. "You think I like being a leech all the time? I can do my share, same as you!"
"N-no, I--"
"Shut up!"
"I didn't mean--" he began. He broke off, sighing. "Sorry, Asuka," he said. "I didn't mean anything by it, really. Thank you."
"Tch," she mumbled. "Idiot."

Shinji lay in his room, staring at the ceiling. "Asuka?" He asked. "Are you awake?"
"Stupid Shinji," she grumbled. "If I wasn't before I would be now."
"Sorry," he said.
Her lip curled up in a sneer. That damn word! She sighed, willing herself to calm down. "Well?" she asked. "What do you want?"
Shinji chewed his lip for a moment, then asked, "Do you really think Kaworu was my enemy?"
"Tch. Why are you asking me?" she asked. "I never even met the guy."
"I know. But even so . . . " he began.
Asuka was silent for a few moments. Eventually she said, "I used to think the Angels were monsters. Terrible, alien beasts bent on destroying everyone. But Misato says they're human beings, like us. That their souls are the same as ours."
"Yeah," Shinji said. "She told me that once, too."
"If that's true," she went on, "maybe he was just lonely. Maybe he didn't know anything about being human, and just told you what he thought you wanted to hear. Or maybe he was your enemy, and changed his mind after talking to you. If he really was a person he could change his mind, just like anyone else."
"Heh. I thought only girls could do that," Shinji said mildly.
She scowled at him. "Are you looking for a beating, Third?"
"Sorry, sorry," he said, laughing. "I'm just kidding."
"Tch," she said. "Go to sleep, stupid Shinji. I've had enough irritation for one day."
"Alright," he said. He was quiet for a moment. Then, "Asuka?"
She ground her teeth in irritation. "Whaaaat?"
"Thanks," he said. "Sometimes, you're really nice."
"Tch. I'm always nice," she grumbled.
He laughed at her, his mood noticeably improved. She frowned at him, then turned on her side, facing the wall. "Idiot," she mumbled.

March 23, 2027

"I didn't even know Mr. Kaji had a brother," Shinji said.
Asuka glanced at him sidelong. She sat with her hands behind her head in the back seat, Shinji beside her as Misato drove. "He doesn't talk about him much," she said. "I never learned why."
Misato looked at her in the rearview mirror. "Heishiro died shortly after Second Impact," she said. "Kaji was responsible."
Shinji's eyes widened. "Responsible? How?"
Misato frowned, deliberating, then shrugged. "I guess it can't hurt to tell you," she said. "Kaji and his brother were part of a gang back then, a bunch of kids scavenging whatever they could to survive. They made a habit of breaking into U.N. storehouses to steal food, and one day Kaji got caught. They gave him a choice: either he told them where his friends were hiding out, or they'd shoot him right then and there. Kaji told them, and they let him go. He tried to beat them back to the hideout, to warn his friends, but he was too late. When he got there they were all dead. He's never forgiven himself for that."
"Jeez," Asuka said, grimacing. "That sucks."
"It was a very different time back then," Misato said.
"Tch. I wonder how his brother will react?" Asuka asked. "I mean, they had to have seen one another in Instrumentality, right?"
Misato shrugged. "I'm not sure," she said. "Kaji seemed to think they'd mostly sorted things out, but he was awfully nervous when he left today. So, I dunno."

Kaji stood before the door of the hospital room, willing himself to enter. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then opened the door.
The boy on the bed was as he remembered him: all of twelve years old, wearing a backwards-facing baseball cap and an irreverent demeanor. But the resentment in his face . . . that was new. The boy looked at him, wide-eyed, then scowled and looked away. "Who the fuck are you?" he asked.
Kaji gave him a weak smile. "It's me, Heishiro," he said. "I'm your brother, Ryoji."
"Liar!" Heishiro spat. "My brother is only a few years older than I am, not some . . . some . . . some old man!"
Kaji winced, then pressed on. "A lot has happened since then," he said. "We've . . . the world has . . . "
Heishiro scoffed at him. "You think I'm stupid, old man?" He paused, as tears came to his face. "My brother would never . . . he'd never . . . " He broke off, crying.
Kaji reached out to him. "Heishiro," he began, " I--"
'You sold us out, you bastard!" Heishiro screamed. "You sold us out to save your own skin! You . . . you . . . " he broke off.
"I know," Kaji said. "What I did was unforgivable. There's nothing I can do to apologize, so I won't even try."
Heishiro stared at the ground, fuming with resentment.
Kaji cleared his throat. "Look, apart from that, we have to figure out your living situation," he said.
Heishiro glared at him. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"Well," Kaji said, "we've set you up with a nice foster family. People will be looking after you--"
"What the fuck!" Heishiro exclaimed. "You're just gonna palm me off on some strangers?"
"Well--" Kaji began.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Heishiro yelled. "You can't just--"
Kaji held out a placating hand. "Hey now," he said, "take it easy. I wasn't trying to get rid of you, I just assumed--"
"Tch," Heishiro spat. "Yeah, I get it. You just assumed. Typical."
Kaji's hand dropped to his side. "What do you want me to say?" he asked.
"I don't want to live with strangers," the boy mumbled.
"Well, after what happened . . . " Kaji trailed off, then shrugged.
Heishiro shook his head. "Forget it," he said. "I'm not doing it." He was silent for a few moments, then looked at Kaji directly. "It's not like I don't understand," he said, his voice low. "They had a gun to your head. What were you supposed to do? And besides," he added, shrugging, "they probably would have caught us all eventually anyway."
Kaji frowned. "If you want . . . " he began. "I mean, you can stay with me, if you like. I guess it'll be kinda weird, but--"
"I don't wanna stay with strangers," Heishiro said. He shook his head. "Fuck that."
Kaji sighed, then nodded. "Okay, then." He laughed. "Man, how am I gonna explain this to Misato? She's gonna kill me."
"Who's Misato?" Heishiro asked.

Heishiro looked around the apartment, then nodded in satisfaction. "Nice digs,", he said. He spied Misato, then added, "Who's the old lady?"
Misato glared at him. "Old lady?" she snarled.
Heishiro nodded. "Yeah," he said, "You're old, and you're a lady. Hence, old lady."
Kaji winced, holding up his hands. "Now now, Misato," he said. "He's just a kid--"
"Tch," she said. "He's a kid who needs to learn some manners!"
Heishiro stuck out his tongue, utterly unrepentant.
Misato grabbed a fistful of the boy's hair, holding his head steady while she stared directly into his eyes. "Listen, you little twerp. I'll cut you some slack since you're Kaji's brother, but get this straight: this is my home. You're here because I allow it, so show me some respect."
Heishiro struggled for a bit, but her grip didn't waver. Neither did her stare. It only took a few seconds for him to give in. "Fine, whatever you want!" he whined. "Just let me go!"
Misato grinned, her demeanor changing in an instant. She ruffled Heishiro's hair and said, "That's better! Welcome to the home of Misato Katsuragi!"
Heishiro groaned as Misato manhandled him.
Kaji smirked. "Get used to it, kid," he said. "Misato's a hardass, but she loves her family. Best to suck it up and soldier on."
Misato grinned. Heishiro whined. Kaji sighed. All was right with the world.

August 11, 2024

"Can I ask you something?" he asked.
"Hmmm?" Asuka gave him a quizzical look, staring at him over the remnants of breakfast on her empty plate.
Shinji squirmed in his seat. "It's kind of sensitive," he said. "I mean--"
"Stop it," she huffed. "You're being weird."
"But--"
She glared at him. "Just spit it out," she said.
"Okay," he said. He took a deep breath. "When you were fighting the Evas--"
He broke off as Asuka's fist hit the table. "You can't be serious," she said. Her voice was barely above a whisper, but that did nothing to diminish the menace in its tone.
Shinji licked his lips, then continued. "I was just wondering," he said. "Your mother was there, right? I mean, she was with you."
Asuka stared at him, her eyes locked with his, then broke off with a sigh. "Not this again," she said, running a hand through her hair.
"Sorry," he said.
Asuka tapped the table with a finger, thinking. Finally she said, "yes, she was with me."
"What was it like?" he asked, leaning forward. "Being with her, having her there with you. What was it like?"
She closed her eyes. "It was nice," she said. "The best feeling in the world. She was all around me, protecting me, keeping me safe." She opened her eyes. "I don't think I've ever been happier than I was in those few moments."
"So you knew it was her, right?" he asked. "It wasn't just some vague feeling?"
She nodded. "Yeah, I knew it was her. She was right there with me, protecting me."
"Of course I was," Kyoko said, coming into the kitchen. "What mother wouldn't be?"
"Mama . . . " Asuka said.
Kyoko frowned. "What? I'm just saying--"
"Mama, stop." Asuka's voice was soft, but the command in it was unmistakable.
Kyoko looked from her daughter to Ikari, who was trembling, and then back again. Finally she shrugged. "Fine, fine," she said, indifferent. She opened the refrigerator and retrieved a bottle of orange juice.
Shinji put his face in his hands. "Why would she leave?" he asked. "I just . . . I don't understand. She left me there, in the middle of . . . of a wasteland, and she just . . . " He looked at Kyoko. "Why would she do that? Am I really that awful?"
Kyoko frowned, then sat down, placing her glass of juice on the table in front of her. "It had nothing to do with you," she said flatly.
"But--"
"A mother loves her child," she said simply.
He blinked at her. "What do you mean?"
"Just what I said," she replied. "A mother loves her child. He might be unpleasant, a failure, even a criminal, but she loves him just the same. It doesn't matter who he is or what he's done. A mother loves her child."
Shinji made to strike the table with his fist, then laid his palms flat against it instead. "Then why," he asked, deliberately, "did she leave?"
Kyoko tapped her chin, thinking. "There was something wrong with her," she murmured. Her eyes brightened. "I knew her once, did you know that?"
He shook his head.
"We went to college together, as I understand it. She and I spent a bit of time together after you and Asuka were born, before Asuka and I left for Germany."
Asuka laughed. "So we'd met before?" she asked. "Me and stupid Shinji, I mean."
Kyoko nodded, smiling. "I actually remember that, too. I remember staring down at you, thinking you were the cutest thing ever, while Yui did the same with Shinji."
Asuka smirked at Shinji. "How about that, eh? The red string of fate bound us together even then." She frowned. "Kind of depressing, now that I think about it."
Shinji laughed weakly.
"Back then," Kyoko went on, "she was like any other mother, and it was clear she adored you. But at some point, after we left for Germany, something changed. I don't know what it was, but I know it had nothing to do with you." She frowned, thinking. "I don't remember the details," she said, "but I think she sent me . . . letters?" She nodded. "Yes, that's right. Langley found them. She didn't say anything specific, of course, but as I recall she wanted to ensure that you'd have a future of sorts, no matter how difficult."
Shinji leaned forward. "So it was for my sake, then?" he asked. "She wasn't some, some crazy person, some lunatic bent on saving the Angels?"
"Well, I don't know anything about that," Kyoko said, frowning. "But it seems she had very few options available to her. I think she just did the best she could under the circumstances."
Shinji closed his eyes and sank into his chair, visibly relaxing. Asuka took his hand in hers and breathed a silent "thank you" to her mother.
Kyoko shrugged uncomfortably and took a sip of her juice.

September 20, 2030

"Well?" she asked.
He fidgeted. "I don't know what you want me to say," he said.
She scowled. "Something other than that."
He made a nervous gesture with his hands. "But you already know everything," he said, frustrated. "You saw--"
"Yes," Kyoko interrupted, "I saw. Even in your own mind, you're a pathetic failure of a man. What of it?"
"Fine," he said, frowning. "If that's how you feel, you never have to deal with me again."
She threw up her hands. "You idiot!" she cried. "Is that what you think I want? Really?" She shook her head. "Unbelievable. That Ikari twerp is positively insightful compared to you."
The man's reply was interrupted by the arrival of another party. "Is there a problem here?" Misato asked, standing in the doorway.
Kyoko glared at her. "No," she hissed, "no problem. This is between me and my future husband. It doesn't concern you."
The man looked at Kyoko in shock, clearly unaware of her intentions. Misato looked taken aback for a moment, then collected herself and moved forward. "Leaving aside the fact that he's my father," she said, "the way you're berating him is unacceptable."
Kyoko's lip twitched. "But--"
"Ms. Soryu," Misato said, her voice full of steel, "we are all broken people. We have made mistakes. We have done terrible things. But we are trying to make amends, to heal our wounds and move forward." She smiled at the woman. "Be kind."
Kyoko's eyes narrowed. "I don't do kind," she growled.
Misato paused, giving the woman in front of her a hard stare. Then she murmured, "I know."
Kyoko's eyes went wide. She glared at Misato, trembling with rage. She spared the man, one Akira Katsuragi, a hateful glance, then stalked out of the room without another word.

"Oh dear GOD, I hate that woman," Kyoko said, pacing back and forth.
Asuka turned over a card and frowned, no closer to resolving her game. "Mother, please," she said, "calm down."
Kyoko scowled at her. "Easy for you to say," she groused. "That woman, she--"
"What did she say that was so terrible, anyway?" Asuka asked, interrupting her.
Kyoko crossed her arms and turned away with a huff. "Nothing specific," she said.
Asuka narrowed her eyes. "In other words, you're just mad because she's right."
Kyoko stiffened, then forced herself to relax. "Well, of course she's right," she huffed. "But that's hardly the point."
Asuka gave her mother a pointed stare, then sighed and stood up.
"Look, Asuka dear--" Kyoko began.
"Come on, mother." Asuka took her arm and headed for the door.
Kyoko stiffened, offering half-hearted resistance, but Asuka's grip was firm. "What?" she asked. "Where?"
"To Misato's place, of course," Asuka said.
Kyoko's eyes widened. "But--"
"You need to apologize."
"I do not!" Kyoko protested. "She--"
Asuka glared at her. "Now, mother." Her tone brooked no quarter for dissent.
Kyoko frowned, but offered no other reply.

Asuka knocked on Misato's door, Kyoko standing sullenly at her side. Presently the door opened, Misato on the other side, answering with a smile. "Heya Asuka," she chirped. "What's up?"
Asuka sighed, then pointed toward her mother. "My mother has something she wants to say," she mumbled.
Misato looked toward Kyoko expectantly.
Kyoko frowned, then said, "No, I don't."
Asuka elbowed her in the ribs. "Mama," she said, "c'mon."
Kyoko coughed. "Well," she said, "It's just that . . . "
Misato smirked. "Yes?" she asked.
Kyoko flushed. "Your father  . . . " She paled. "That is, Mr. Katsuragi, he . . . " She faltered, and went silent.
Misato offered her a soft smile. "It's not like I don't understand," she said. "He's failed me a lot, too."
Kyoko fidgeted. "If only he were  like Ikari," she said. "He's a waste, but at least he tries to make things better. Akira just . . . "
Asuka and Misato shared a glance.
"Oh my God," Asuka said.
Kyoko blinked at her. "What?" she asked. She looked at Misato, then back at Asuka. "What is it?"
"You admire him," Asuka said, pointing an accusing finger at her mother. "You admire Shinji!"
Kyoko crossed her arms. "Don't be ridiculous," she huffed.
Asuka put her hands on her hips, a goofy grin on her face. "You do! You so do!" She turned to Misato. "I'm right, aren't I?"
Misato nodded. "Sure sounds that way to me."
Kyoko flushed again. "I don't . .  . " Then she sighed, giving up. "I don't admire him, exactly. But I do admire his . . . " she frowned, considering. " . . . persistence, I suppose." She tossed her head. "And what of it? It's an admirable trait, even in an obstinate brat like Ikari."
Asuka laughed, pumping a fist in the air in victory. "Woo hoo!" she cried. "Finally, finally, FINALLY!"
Kyoko gave her a bemused glance. "If I'd known my approval meant that much to you I would have offered it years ago."
Asuka grinned at her, absolutely giddy.
Misato smiled at the girl's display, then turned her attention back to Kyoko. "Mrs. Soryu," she said, "my father's been through a lot, and he has a lot to answer for. But even so, I truly believe he's a decent man at heart. Give him time."
Kyoko scowled at her. "I was fucking him when you were barely out of diapers, Katsuragi. I'm pretty sure I know his nature better than you do."
Misato blanched at that. "Mrs. Soryu, please . . . "

Shinji made his way to the incinerator, idly wondering why he was the one who always wound up making the trip. Along the way he spied Akira Katsuragi, sitting on a bench, looking utterly dejected. He dropped off his garbage, and on the way back stopped to consider the man. After dithering for awhile he clenched his hand in decision and approached the man. "Mr. Katsuragi?" he asked. "Are you alright?"
The man started, then looked up in surprise. "Oh!" he said. "Mr. Ikari, wasn't it?"
Shinji nodded.
Katsuragi smiled at him. "I knew your father. He . . . " he frowned, trailing off.
Shinji laughed. "It's okay, sir. You don't have to say anything."
Katsuragi nodded gratefully, then fell silent.
Shinji sat beside him. "Is something wrong sir?" he asked.
Katsuragi frowned, unsure as to how to proceed. Finally he said, "Let's just say I'm . . . not very good with women."
Shinji smiled sympathetically. "Mrs. Soryu is a . . . formidable woman," he observed.
Katsuragi gave a short laugh. "That's putting it mildly."
Shinji laughed again. "I have enough trouble with her as Asuka's mother. I can't imagine how hard it must be to deal with her directly."
Katsuragi frowned. "She's not a bad person," he said.
Shinji shook his head. "No," he admitted, "of course not. But the Soryu women admire strength," he went on. "If you're weak, they expect you to rise above it. And if you're strong, they expect you to push harder in order to excel. The one thing they hate is people who give up, who run away."
Katsuragi frowned, and Shinji laughed. "I'm the same way," he said. "I want nothing more than to run away, but I know I'll disappoint her if I do. So I don't. I keep trying, even if it hurts, because I know that will inspire her to do the same thing."
The other man stroked his chin. "Is that really worth it, though? That's a terrible burden to place upon yourself, and on her."
Shinji shrugged. "Maybe it wouldn't be for some people, but it is for us." He smiled at the elder Katsuragi. "I guess it's up to you to decide, in the end."
Katsuragi frowned again, deep in thought.

Katsuragi knocked on the door before him. It opened, and he found Kyoko on the other side. She said nothing to him, just stared at him sullenly while she waited for him to speak. "I would like to speak with you," he said. He gave her a nervous half-smile. "Perhaps over coffee?"
"Tch," she said. "Afraid to talk to me in private?"
He closed his eyes and sighed. "Kyoko, please."
She stared at him for a moment, then shook her head in disgust. "Fine," she said. She grabbed her coat and stepped outside.
The walk to the cafe was short, and they endured the trip in silence. When they arrived they bought their coffee and sat down in a booth. She stared at the walls, looking at nothing in particular, while he fidgeted. Finally, he mustered up the nerve he needed to speak. "I just don't understand," he said. "Why do you want to pursue this?"
She met his gaze. "Why wouldn't I?" she asked. "Your wife's no longer in the picture, so what's stopping us?"
He flinched at the mention of his wife, but let it pass. "You don't seem to have a high opinion of me."
She deflated a bit at that. "That's not true," she said.
"Everything you say to me indicates otherwise," he said.
She put her head in her hands. She was trembling now.
"And it's not like you don't have good reasons to feel as you do," he went on. "All of us have made mistakes, but none have been as costly as mine."
She looked up at him, puzzled. "What are you talking about?" she asked.
He shrugged. "I am the man who destroyed the world, if you'll recall. Second Impact and everything that came after were my doing. Why would you want anything to do with me after that?"
She shook her head in denial. "That's not your fault," she said. "You were duped."
He laughed. "Of course I was duped," he said. "Because I'm an idiot, as you say."
"That's not why you're an idiot," she said, deadpan. She massaged her temples and took a deep breath. "Look, you organized that expedition to find out what was out there. That was your only goal. You didn't know anything about the Dead Sea Scrolls, or the Seeds, or any of the rest of it. You simply wanted to learn, to understand. And that curiosity, that hunger for knowledge is one of the things I truly love about you. The fact that that curiosity was abused for malign ends is disgusting, but you're not responsible for any of that."
"I disagree. But that aside, how can you love anything about me?" he asked. "You said you don't remember anything before your daughter's birth."
"I don't," she admitted, "at least not directly. But I saw myself through your eyes, remember? That's enough to tell me how I felt back then, and how I will feel again once things settle down."
He looked at his coffee cup. "Even so . . . "
She sighed, then placed her palms flat on the table. "It's not just that," she began. "I don't have many options, Akira; I'm old, I'm foreign, I'm psychologically damaged, and I'm physically scarred." She frowned. "I'm as human as anyone, I don't want to be alone. But I can't afford to be choosy."
"So we should settle for one another? Is that what you're saying?" he asked.
She shook her head. "I don't see it that way. I just . . . " she trailed off, then shrugged.
He sighed, then ran a hand through his hair. He looked back at her, studying her profile as she leaned on the table with her chin in her hand. "Is that why you've been so hostile?" he asked. "You've taken stock of your situation, found it wanting, and now . . . "
He was kind enough to leave the implication unsaid, but she squirmed in her seat even so. "Maybe," she said, shrugging.
He stared at her, considering. "I'm not very good at this sort of thing. You know that better than most."
"Oh, yes," she scoffed, "like I'm some sort of expert." She shook her head. "But we do have a great deal in common. That hunger for knowledge, for one. Our research interests." Her gaze darkened. "Even our failures. That's more than most people have." She leaned forward, her eyes pleading with him. "I can't be kind, Akira, but I don't . . . I don't have to be cruel. I . . . "
He laid his hands over hers. "That's enough," he said. "I'm satisfied. That's enough."

Misato Katsuragi opened the door to her apartment, then made her way to her bedroom. Kaji sat at the desk, poring over paperwork, but she paid him no mind. Instead she flopped down on the futon, dragging the pillow over her head.
"Rough day?" Kaji asked.
Misato groaned. "My father is younger than I am, and he's marrying the mother of the girl I raised as my child."
"Oh my," Kaji murmured. "How incestuous."
"Shut up," Misato grumbled.
Kaji laughed. "That's pretty quick, though," he noted. "He's only been back for a week, and as I recall she doesn't remember anything about him."
Misato rolled over. "I have no idea what's going through that woman's mind," she said. "I thought Asuka was a handful, but her mother is insane."
"Does it bother you?" he asked.
She snorted. "Hell no," she said. "As long as it doesn't hurt us or the kids my dad can marry a turnip for all I care." She frowned. "It's gonna be weird having Asuka as a stepsister, though."
Kaji scratched his head. "Our family tree is getting awfully confusing," he said.
"'Getting?'" she asked. "Don't forget about poor Shinji and Rei!"
"Heh. Good point." He frowned. "But even so, this is . . . well . . . " He scratched his head again. "Hmmm."
"Don't remind me," she said. She smirked. "Heh. Asuka's gonna lose her mind. First I take her crush, then my dad takes her mother, and now she officially has to call me family." She sat up suddenly as inspiration struck. "Oh, man," she said, a devious smile playing about her lips. "This is gonna be fun."
"Now now," he said. "Don't forget, she's your adopted daughter."
"I know," Misato said, gleefully rubbing her hands together. "That just means I get to dig into her that much more."
Kaji winced. "You're a dangerous woman, Katsuragi."
Misato laughed, a low, sultry laugh. "And don't you forget it, mister."

Shinji was playing video games when Asuka found him. He was sitting cross-legged, his face a mask of concentration as he focused on trying to beat the game's current level. But that was of no consequence at the moment; Asuka was happy, and she was going to share her happiness with him -- whether he wanted it or not.
She made her way toward him, mischief in her eyes, and when she reached him she crawled into his lap.
Shinji let out a sound of annoyance. "Asuka, I'm trying to--" The rest of his protest was cut off, as Asuka had covered his mouth with hers and was kissing him deeply. He let the controller fall from his hand, the game instantly forgotten.
Asuka straddled him, twining her arms around his neck and pressing close. When she finally came up for air Asuka flashed him an impish grin, then hugged him warmly. In his confusion he could only think to respond accordingly, wrapping his arms around her back. She gave him another squeeze and drew back, smiling down at him.
He studied her, frowning thoughtfully. "You seem to be in a good mood," he observed.
She nodded. "Mmm-hmmm." She cupped his face with her hands and kissed him again.
Between kisses Shinji asked, "What brought this on?"
Asuka paused for breath and grinned again. "Mama said she admires you."
He scowled at her. "That doesn't sound likely."
She laughed. "I know, but she said it. Misato was there, she can vouch for me."
"That's . . . um . . . huh." He laughed sheepishly. "I don't know what to make of that."
She pressed close, hugging him again. "She was complaining about Misato's dad, and said she wished he was more like you." She closed her eyes. "I was so happy. I didn't know how much her approval mattered, but it does. It matters so much."
Shinji held her tightly. "That's wonderful, Asuka," he said. "I'm so happy for you." They drew back again, and he smiled when he saw the happiness in her eyes. "I love seeing you like this."
She flashed him a wicked grin. "You're gonna see a lot more of me in a few seconds, stupid Shinji," she said, pulling her shirt over her head and tossing it aside. Shinji's eyes widened in surprise, but he played along when she pushed him down to the floor and got to work.

September 13, 2030

The man emerged from the LCL, clad in tattered scraps of clothing. He remembered . . . something. A sense of urgency, of something gone terribly wrong. What was it, he wondered? And, more importantly, where was his daughter?
He turned back, looking across the LCL sea. For a moment, he beheld the visage of a boy, a youth with grey hair and red eyes. The boy smiled at him, a smile of understanding and forgiveness. The man blinked, and the boy was gone.
When he turned toward the shore, he found men there waiting for them. They were armed and they asked questions. What is your name? Where are you from? Do you have any family that you know of? He gave them their answers, disoriented as he was, and wondered what had happened since the world went to hell.

They brought him to the wing of a hospital, something they called the "recovery ward". He looked around, utterly bewildered. His last memory was of Antarctica, how on Earth did he wind up here? And where was his daughter?

It wasn't long before he saw her: a tall woman, with raven-black hair. But that couldn't be, could it? She was his age, and his Misato was only a girl. But then she looked at him, and the clipboard dropped from her hand. "Father?" she asked.

Impossible, he said. She was a just a child, and yet . . . and yet . . .

There were people he had to meet, she said. Family, her family. He'd never been good with family, never done right by them, so it seemed fitting that he have an accounting with hers. He was nervous, somehow. Why was he even here?

She took him home, and he met her "family". A boy, a girl . . . no, that wasn't quite accurate. They were adults, clearly. The Second and Third Children, she said. Pilots? Evangelions? All the fruits of his efforts, somehow. And then her husband, and her . . . nephew? Adopted son? That part wasn't clear. And then . . .

The vision of her struck him like a bolt of lightning. Her honey blonde locks, that imperious expression . . . he'd recognize her anywhere. "Kyoko?" he asked.
She stared at him, the way a regent might stare at a worm. "Oh," she said. "It's you."
The red-headed girl -- Kyoko's daughter, apparently -- stared at him. She shifted her gaze from him to her mother and back again. "Eh?" she asked. "What?" Her eyes widened with horror as the meaning of her mother's words sank in. "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT???"

July 3, 2024

Asuka stared at the numbers in front of her, trying to force them to make sense by force of will alone. But it didn't work; the math didn't add up, no matter how she looked at it. She scratched her head, growling in frustration.
Her mother pursed her lips, looking at her with slight disdain. "What are you so upset about?" she asked.
Asuka shook her head. "The equations don't work. The math is all off. I can't figure out what's wrong."
Shinji shot her a sympathetic look, but kept his mouth shut; there was nothing he could do for her here, and he knew it. But Kyoko took one look at her work and frowned in disapproval. "Why are you using an unbounded value for Epsilon?" she asked.
Asuka looked at her, confused. "I accounted for the Earth's magnetic field," she said.
"Silly girl," Kyoko chided. That earned her a frown from Shinji, something not lost on either woman. "What of gravitic and temporal effects?"
Asuka scowled at her. "Those are weak forces, they aren't even relevant."
Kyoko crossed her arms, frowning at her daughter. "How foolish. Epsilon is a progressive value, and that means its interaction with spacetime must be addressed if we are to fully appreciate the utility of the AT Field." She typed a figure using Asuka's keyboard. "Here, try this instead," she said. Asuka reluctantly re-ran her calculations, and her eyes widened when she saw the results. "Holy shit," she exclaimed. "Everything works out. Like . . . everything!"
Kyoko preened. "Of course," she said. "I developed Unit 02, you know. I understand these things."
Asuka grinned in delight. "Mama," she said, "why don't you come work with me? It would make things so much easier . . . "
Kyoko scoffed at her. "Don't be silly," she said. "My knowledge is twenty years out of date. What possible use would I be at a modern university?"
Asuka deflated at that, but Shinji perked up. "I think that's a good idea," he said.
Kyoko glared at him. "When I want your opinion, Ikari, I'll be sure to beat it out of you."
Shinji sighed, and fell silent.
Asuka frowned at her mother. "Mama," she said, "don't talk to him like that. You make me want to defend him, and then I have to be nice to him."
Kyoko smirked. "So tragic," she said.
Shinji bit his lip, then said, "I would be okay with that, actually."
Asuka hushed him. "You be quiet," she said.
Shinji sighed again.
Kyoko pursed her lips, then said, "Well, I suppose I could offer my services as a consultant. I'm sure the University wouldn't object to that."
Asuka smiled in delight. "That'd be wonderful!" she exclaimed.
Shinji nodded in agreement. "And with any luck you'll be able to make sure she eats properly, too."
Kyoko raised an eyebrow. "Oh?" she asked.
Asuka glared at Shinji. "It's nothing," she said.
Shinji frowned. "It's not," he said.
Asuka folded her arms, clearly unhappy.
"Three times in the last week," Shinji began, "you skip breakfast and say you'll make up for it at lunch. Each time I made you a bento, and you brought it home uneaten."
Asuka huffed in frustration. "Stop acting like I have a problem or something," she began. "I just get distracted and forget, that's all. It's not like I don't make up for it later!"
"Well then," Kyoko said, "surely having someone around to remind you would be no great chore."
Asuka laughed nervously. "Mama," she said, "c'mon . . . "
Kyoko nodded to herself. "I'm a consultant," she said. "I clearly have to look after my employers."
Shinji nodded earnestly. "I agree!" he said.
Asuka looked from one to the other and back again. "Since when did you two team up?" she asked.
Shinji looked at Kyoko. "We teamed up?" he asked.
Kyoko quirked an eyebrow. "I was not aware," she said.
Asuka threw up her hands. "Oh, come on," she exclaimed, exasperated.
Shinji couldn't help but laugh.

June 26, 2024

Kyoko Soryu looked up as the door opened. "What do you want?" she hissed.
Misato Katsuragi stared back at her blandly. "We've been getting complaints--" she began.
"Like I care," Soryu spat. "Why are you keeping me here? Where is my daughter?"
"We're not keeping her from you," Katsuragi said. "It's just, your situation is complicated, and she--"
"Stop lying to me," Soryu interrupted. "I want to see her."
Misato laughed nervously. "I understand, but--"
"Now!" Soryu demanded.
Katsuragi sighed. "Very well," she said. "If that's what you want. But she--"
Soryu scowled. "I don't care about what you have to say," she groused. "Only her."
"Alright then," Misato said, resigned. "I'll call her."

When Asuka entered the room, her mother was pacing back and forth like a caged animal. Her head snapped toward her daughter as soon as she opened the door. "Asuka!" she exclaimed, hurrying over to her. "Finally! Why are they keeping me here? What's going on?"
Asuka took her mother by the arms, trying to calm her down. "It's fine, mama," she said. "Things are just a little complicated."
Kyoko scowled at her. "'Complicated' is a word people used to justify bad behavior," she muttered.
Asuka winced. "It's not like that," she said. "The doctors are worried about you. They know how bad things were for me when I came back, so they're being extra careful with you. And we're also trying to get your living situation sorted out--"
"What's to sort out?" Kyoko said, interrupting her. "I'm a grown woman, I can live perfectly well on my own."
Asuka gave her a weak smile. "Oh?  How much have you slept since you returned?"
Kyoko stared at her. "Very little," she admitted. "Every time I close my eyes, those things, those loathsome beasts . . . "
"I know, mama," Asuka said. "It was the same for me. That's why we're trying to be careful."
Kyoko shrugged. "Fine, then. I'll stay with you if that's what you want. Or would that be too much of a burden?"
Asuka shook her head sharply. "No, of course not! I'd love to have you stay with me, I really would. It's just that, well . . . " she hedged.
Kyoko's eyes narrowed. "This is about a man, isn't it?"
Asuka flushed. "Um, kinda."
Kyoko crossed her arms. "Typical. Men are always like that, controlling peoples' lives." She rubbed a temple. "I don't even know why I think that, it's not like I remember anything. But I know it's true. Everyone else, all those other people confirmed it."
"He's not like that, mama," Asuka said. "He's really not."
Kyoko looked at her, chin in hand. "Then what's the issue?" she asked wearily.
"Well . . . " Asuka hesitated. Then she directed her voice to the open door. "Shinji? Could you come in here for a minute?"
Kyoko stared her in confusion, which turned to shock when Shinji entered the room. He smiled nervously at her. She turned back to Asuka. "Have you lost your mind?" She breathed, horrified. "Why would you take up with him, of all people?"
"Mama--" Asuka began.
"After what he did to you? To us? Why would you even entertain the idea--"
"Mama, please--" Asuka pleaded.
Kyoko turned to Shinji. "What have you done to her, you louse? She would never associate with you after what you did. What are you--"
Shinji licked his lips nervously. "Please, Mrs. Soryu, you're upsetting her, she--" He broke off when Asuka touched his arm.
Kyoko opened her mouth, a contemptuous reply on her lips, but a glance at Asuka brought her up short. She was trembling, visibly upset. Kyoko closed her mouth and waited.
Asuka closed her eyes, breathing deeply to calm herself. Then she opened her eyes and met her mother's gaze. "Please don't say things like that, mama. I know he's made a lot of mistakes," she said. Kyoko scoffed, but didn't reply. "But that was a long time ago. He's tried very hard to make amends since, and he's been very good to me. Please, just let me explain. Please, mama."
Kyoko glared at Shinji, then shook her head in disgust. "Fine," she muttered. "I guess I have no choice."

"You can't be serious," Kyoko said, aghast. "Me? Living under the same roof as him? That's insane."
"Mama--" Asuka began.
"Even if things are as you say, that doesn't change my feelings," Kyoko went on. "To me he's still . . . " she clenched her hands into fists, then let it go. "No. Impossible. I'd rather take my chances on my own."
Asuka's face fell. "I see," she mumbled.
Kyoko's head snapped up at the tone in her daughter's voice. "Wait," she said. "I didn't mean it like that." She hurried over to Asuka, and when she spoke there was an edge of panic in her voice. "You have to believe me, Asuka, I would never--"
Asuka smiled weakly. "I know, mama. It's fine. We'll . . . we'll figure something else out." She turned to Shinji. "Come on," she said. "Let's go. We'll talk to Misato, I guess. See what else we can do."
Shinji looked from one woman to the other and back again, chewing his lip in indecision. Finally, he clenched his fist and turned to Kyoko. "Mrs. Soryu," he said, "Please reconsider."
Asuka grit her teeth. "Shinji . . . " she warned, the tone of her voice unmistakable.
Shinji ignored her, continuing to address Kyoko. "This is very important to her," he went on. "She's missed you terribly these past few years, and she was so excited to have you back. I can't bear the thought that I'm getting in the way of that."
"Shinji, that's enough," Asuka growled.
Once again, Shinji ignored her. He got on his hands and knees, bowing low before Kyoko. "Please, Mrs. Soryu. Please give me the chance to prove you wrong!"
Kyoko looked at the man on the ground before her, then turned to Asuka, utterly baffled.
Asuka flushed and hid her face with her hands. "Shinjiii!" she whined.
Kyoko turned back to Shinji. "Get up, you fool. You're embarrassing yourself."
"A little embarrassment is nothing compared to what you've suffered!" he said. "For your daughter's sake and for mine, please reconsider!"
Kyoko frowned with distaste, then threw up her hands. "Fine, whatever you want. Just cease this ridiculous display this instant!"
Shinji stood, keeping his eyes on the floor as he moved to stand by Asuka. He snuck a glance at her, and winced at her disapproving frown.
Asuka turned to her mother, her expression hopeful. "Do you mean it, mama? You'll reconsider?"
Kyoko just waved a hand in exasperation. Then she turned to Shinji. "Your father was bad enough, but you're unbelievable. You really are an idiot," she stated flatly. Shinji blinked, while Asuka looked poleaxed. A moment later she suppressed a giggle. "What is it?" Kyoko asked, looking from one to the other. "What's so funny?"
Asuka gave her a strained smile and scratched her head. "It's nothing, mama. I'll explain later."
Kyoko was not amused. "Tch."

"Are you absolutely sure about this?" Misato asked. "I know you said she agreed, but even so . . . "
"No, I'm not certain at all," Asuka replied. "But what other options do we have? I don't want her living alone, and I'm not about to kick Shinji out of his own home. And besides," she went on, "I don't think I could deal with her on my own, anyway."
Misato bit her lip. "Things have been pretty rough for you since she came back, haven't they?"
Asuka laughed mirthlessly. "What gave it away?"
"The circles under your eyes, Shinji's nervousness, your jumpiness. It would be obvious even if I didn't know you as well as I do."
"Figures," Asuka said.
Misato stood and stretched. "Alright then. If this is what you want then so be it. I'll get your mother's discharge paperwork sorted out and you can take her home today."
Asuka nodded. "Okay. Thanks, Misato."
Misato smiled at her. "Sure. Just be careful, alright?"

Kyoko awoke with a start, breathing heavily. She blinked several times in confusion, looking around her in bewilderment until recognition set in. She lay back down and closed her eyes again. After a time she became aware of pressure in her bladder; she got up, slid open the bedroom door, and proceeded down the hall to the bathroom. When she was finished she came back, and spared a glance for the two sleeping figures in the apartment's living room. They lay in one another's arms, sleeping fitfully. As she watched Asuka murmured in distress; a nightmare, perhaps. Shinji responded by tightening his arms around her, holding her securely, which quieted her down. She nuzzled his chest and pressed close to him. The expression on her face was . . . not content, surely, but at least calm. Safe. Secure. Kyoko closed her eyes and sighed in resignation. "Why him, of all people?" she lamented. She shook her head and headed back into the bedroom and lay down, but sleep eluded her for the rest of the night.

March 14, 2021

Kaji opened the door to the roof of the apartment complex and stepped outside. He turned his head, taking in the city's skyline, then stopped short when he discovered the roof was already occupied. Asuka was there, lying spread eagled on the ground, a completely bored and listless expression on her face. She turned at the sound of the door opening, regarding him with a frown.
"Heya kid," he said, the friendly mask slipping into place. He strode over to her as she sat up. "What brings you up here?"
She shrugged, bringing her knees to her chest. "Just wanted to get away from them," she said.
He stuck his hands in his pockets, regarding her with a frown. "I thought you all got along these days," he said.
She shrugged. "More or less, yeah," she said. "But they can still be annoying sometimes."
He laughed lightly. "Oh? And why's that?"
She stood up. She was much taller now, he noted, probably 168 cm or so. She looked around, brushing her hands together as she replied. "They're just so . . . helpful," she grumped.
Kaji nodded sympathetically. "I see," he said. "That is truly tragic, yes."
She scowled at him. "That's not what I mean," she said. "It's always 'help Asuka' and 'take care of Asuka' and 'make sure Asuka's alright'. And it's not just Shinji being a dumb guy, either. Misato does it too. It gets irritating after awhile."
"Hmmm." He looked at her curiously. "Are they being patronizing?"
She shook her head. "Nah, nothing like that. They mean well, it's just that . . . well, I start to feel like a leech after awhile."
Kaji nodded in understanding. "I think I see the problem," he said. "You feel like you should be returning the favor, even though that's really not your style."
"Pretty much, yeah," she agreed.
Kaji dug out a cigarette and lit up. "Kid, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret," he said, inhaling deeply. "They aren't doing that for you."
She cocked her head, incredulous. "What are you talking about?" she asked.
"Don't misunderstand," he said. "I'm not saying they don't care for you, because it's obvious they do. But when they hover over you like that it's for their sake, not yours. They feel terrible about what happened to you, and any chance they get to make things easier for you is a gift to them. For them, it's all about balancing the scales, about trying to undo the sins of the past."
She grinned wryly. "So you're saying I'm doing my part just by letting them fuss over me?"
He shrugged. "That's how they work. Helping others lets them feel useful, lets them validate their own existence. People like us don't really understand that, since we define our self worth in other ways. And that's fine, really; they're happy when they can help us, and we're happy when they're happy. It's a symbiotic relationship, one that benefits everyone." He scratched his cheek self-consciously. "I used to think that was a man/woman thing, but between you and Shinji I'm not so sure anymore."
"Idiot," she said. "Girls are more complicated than you think." She frowned, considering. "Guys too, I guess."
He chuckled. "So I'm learning."
She plucked his cigarette out of his mouth, taking a deep drag on it before handing it back to him and heading toward the rooftop door.
"Since when do you smoke?" he asked.
"I don't," she said. "It annoys the idiot. But sometimes, when the opportunity presents itself . . . " She shrugged, hands outstretched, then ran her fingers through her hair.
She opened the door to the roof and headed inside, Kaji watching her backside all the while. He smiled to himself, thinking about how lucky Shinji had it, then looked out past the edge of the roof to the city lights beyond.

In Japanese, Misato's and Okada's lines re: Rei would be reversed. That is to say, it would read like this:

Dr. Okada: Ayanami . . .
Misato: . . . -san?

This is a far more significant exchange than it appears to be in the English version. Asuka is referring to Rei with respect here, referencing her with her name and the proper honorific rather than calling her "Miss Perfect" or "The Commander's pet" as she typically does. Rei has done something profound on Asuka's behalf, and the latter recognizes this fact. It is difficult to convey this particular subtlety in English, but I'm confident it would come across clearly in Japanese.

June 22, 2024

Asuka exited the shop, bag in hand, and paused when she hit the sidewalk. She put a hand on her hip and frowned, then gave a little shrug and turned to head up the street. She moved at a lackadaisical pace, stopping every now and then to peer into shop windows. She continued in this manner for half an hour or so, until she hit the end of the block.
She paused, an odd feeling taking hold of her. A burst of movement from her left caught her attention; a startled flock of birds rushed overhead, taking flight. She followed their movement for a moment, then looked back around the corner. That was when she saw her.
Rei Ayanami.
She stood perhaps halfway down the block, dreamy and ethereal, an apparition looking just as she had in life -- placid, detached, utterly unconcerned. But then she met Asuka's eyes, a clear sign of recognition in them, and she smiled at her, a touch of melancholy on her lips.
Asuka frowned, puzzled. Her phone beeped with an incoming text, distracting her. Asuka dug through her purse, finding the phone and reading the screen, and dropped her bag in shock. Come to RW right away, it read. She looked up at Rei, but the girl was gone. "Mama," she breathed. She launched herself into a sprint, barreling down the street toward Herz HQ. It was six blocks away, but she didn't care -- she ran the whole distance. Somewhere along the way her phone rang, but she ignored it. She had to get to the Recovery Ward! That single thought consumed the entirety of her being.
She stopped at the main gate and handed her ID card to the guard on duty.
"Hey, Miss Soryu," he said. "Nice weather we're having, eh?"
Asuka shook her head, gasping for breath, and he shrugged. He scanned her card and handed it back to her. "Have a nice day!" he said.
Asuka ignored him and continued toward the main building, the one which housed the Recovery Ward. She opened the door and continued to the automated turnstiles, swiping her card to gain access. Once she was through she hurried to the elevators and pressed the "down" button. She waited perhaps thirty seconds for an elevator to arrive, but it felt like an eternity. When the car arrived she entered and hit the button for the Recovery Ward, enduring another tedious trip down.
The doors opened, and she proceeded to the main desk to sign in. The nurse on duty smiled at her. "Hello Miss Soryu!" she said. "Who are you here to see?" she asked.
Asuka glanced at her. "Where is Katsuragi?" she asked, distracted.
The nurse cocked her head. "Colonel Katsuragi?" she asked. She thought for a moment. "I think she's in Ward 7," she said.
Asuka nodded, then hurried down the hall. She entered Ward 7, and found Misato and Dr. Okada waiting for her. She looked at the doctor, surprised by his presence, then turned to Misato. "Mama," she breathed. "Where is she?"
Misato smiled brightly. "Ah, there you are, Asuka. Glad you got my text." She frowned. "Wait, how did you know who it was?" she asked.
"Miss Ayanami," Asuka said, distracted.
Misato and Dr. Okada shared a look. "Miss . . . " Misato began.
" . . . Ayanami?" Okada finished.
Asuka ignored them. She just stared at the door before her and made to open it, a look of desperation in her eyes.
Misato grabbed her arm, stopping her. "Asuka . . . " she began.
Asuka tried to pull away from her. "Let me go!" she whined. "I have to see mama!"
"Wait," Misato said, her grip firm. "She's not the person you remember."
"I don't care," Asuka said. "Let go!"
"Asuka!" Misato growled, shaking the girl. "Stop fighting me and think for a moment!" She took Asuka's shoulders in hand, holding her tightly. "For her, Third Impact happened yesterday." She shook the girl again. "Think about how you felt!"
Asuka stopped, the reality of Misato's words setting in. She looked at Misato, then at Okada, then at the door to the room. Then she looked down at her arm, at the scar running up its length. "That's right," she admitted. "She'll remember everything, won't she?"
Misato nodded. "Yes," she said. "She's a raw nerve right now. I know you need to see her, but you need to be careful."
Asuka chewed her lip, then nodded carefully. "Fine," she said, pushing against Misato. "I understand."
Misato looked at Dr. Okada, a question in her eyes. He nodded, and Misato let the girl go. She turned and opened the door to the room before her.
Kyoko Soryu lay on the bed, her knees drawn to her chest. Even with her eyes closed her face showed obvious signs of distress.
"Mama?" Asuka asked.
The figure on the bed stirred. "Asuka?"  she whispered, turning her head toward the door. She stared at the woman before her. "You . . . you can't be Asuka," she said, frowning. "She's just a girl."
Asuka flinched, but gave the woman a gentle smile. "It's me, mama," she said. "I'm all grown up now."
Kyoko scrutinized her further, noting the girl's hair, her eyes, her face, and finally the scars framing her eye. She looked at Asuka's arm, and found the scar running up its length. Her eyes widened in recognition. "It is you," she breathed.
Asuka nodded.
Kyoko met her eyes, and her face crumpled. "I'm sorry," she said, tears streaming down her face. "I'm so sorry." She covered her eyes with her hands, unable to look at her daughter any longer.
Asuka rushed forward, embracing her mother. "It's fine," she said. "I'm alright."
Kyoko shook her head, sobbing.
Asuka stroked her hair. "Don't worry mama," she said, holding the woman tightly. "I'll take care of you. Everything will be fine."
Kyoko clung to her, shuddering in despair, unable to articulate her thoughts.

Misato and Dr. Okada watched the reunion from the hallway, staring at the two through the observation window.
Misato sighed heavily, running a hand over her face. "What do we even do with her?" she asked.
Dr. Okada stroked his chin, deep in thought. "Obviously, her connection with her daughter is paramount at this point," he said.
Misato huffed. "I got that much," she groused.
Dr. Okada smiled. "Beyond that, we need simply be patient. This should be good for Asuka, since it will give her a taste of what you and Shinji went through when caring for her. With luck, she'll learn to appreciate your efforts even more."
Misato scowled. "I'm not concerned with appreciation, doctor. I just want to know how we keep that woman--" she jerked her head toward Kyoko-- "from ruining all the progress we've made thus far."
Okada laughed, holding up a hand defensively. "Sorry, sorry," he said. "I think it will be fine, so long as it's just the two of them." His face darkened. "But be sure to keep her away from Shinji," he warned. "To her, he's the pernicious fiend who failed them in their darkest hour, and who violated her daughter in particularly egregious fashion. She'll need time to adjust before facing the reality that their circumstances have changed so significantly."
Misato frowned. "Oh, God damn it." She looked at the doctor. "You realize they live together, right?"
Okada shrugged. "Then keep her here, or find Shinji other accommodations. Either way, make sure the two of them don't interact until she's had a chance to find her bearings."
Misato sighed. She pinched the bridge of her nose, then shook her head. "Being a parent sucks sometimes," she said.
Okada smiled, then took a sip of his coffee as he returned his attention to the women in the other room.

April 23, 2022

Shinji didn't recognize the guards who greeted him at the Fuyutsuki residence. They were U.N. soldiers, not Herz, and they were foreigners. They were neither pleasant nor rude with him; they simply checked his pass and let him enter.
The residence was large, but not opulent. Fuyutsuki greeted him at the entrance. "Third Child," he said. "Thank you for coming."
Shinji bowed to him.
Fuyutsuki smiled graciously. "Do you play Shogi?" the elder man asked.
Shinji gave him a confused look. "Well, I only know the rules," he said.
"Good enough," Fuyutsuki said. "Let's have a game." He led Shinji into his living room. "I'll start without my rook, bishop, and gold generals," he went on, sitting down on one side of the gameboard and removing the designated pieces.
They played, Shinji making a rather poor showing for himself. "Calm your mind," Fuyutsuki said. "It's critical to winning a battle."
Shinji's brows knit. "I don't fight anymore," he said. "My battle now is to live, nothing more."
Fuyutsuki glanced up at him, surprised, then smiled sadly. "Yes, I suppose that's true," he said. He sighed. "Thank you for accompanying an old man with his hobby," he said. He made a move. "You see," he went on, "I'm rather timid, too. I needed this excuse to get a chance to talk to you."
Shinji stared at him. "To talk to me?" he asked, wariness in his eyes.
Fuyutsuki nodded. "Do you remember your mother?" he asked.
Shinji tensed. "No," he replied. "I was very young." He gave the man a rueful smile. "And father destroyed all her belongings, as though he was trying to erase all trace of her from the world."
Fuyutsuki smiled. "That is not altogether inaccurate," he said. He produced a picture, one of Shinji's mother holding him as a baby. His father was in it as well; The elder Ikari looked happy, if somewhat uncomfortable.
Shinji looked at the photo. The woman looked very familiar. "Mother?" he said. He smiled slightly. "I guess it's obvious," he said. She looks just like Ayanami."
Fuyutsuki nodded. "Correct," he said. "She was the daughter of one of the founders of Seele, a very powerful woman. Your father's name was Rokubungi before he married her." He smiled, remembering. "She was my student at the university." He stared at Shinji, a hawklike gaze. "You knew your father during Instrumentality," he said. "Do you remember what happened to Yui?"
Shinji nodded, shifting uncomfortably. "She died during the Contact Experiment with Unit 01," he said.
Fuyutsuki frowned at Shinji's discomfort, but elected to continue. "And what do you remember of Rei Ayanami?" he asked.
"Ayanami?" Shinji asked. He frowned. "I think . . . after the Contact Experiment failed, Father tried to restore Mother," he said. "But it didn't work. Instead he got Ayanami, somehow." He shrugged. "Or he made her from mother's remains." He shook his head. "I don't know the details."
Fuyutsuki nodded. "That's correct," he said. "But do you understand why the effort to recover your mother failed?"
"I . . . " Shinji blinked. "No, I don't," he admitted.
Fuyutsuki nodded again. "I thought as much. This is what Ikari -- Gendo Ikari," he clarified, "your father, should have explained to you."
Shinji frowned. "What is there to explain?" he asked, puzzled. "The procedure didn't work. Isn't that the end of it?"
Fuyutsuki shook his head. "No," he denied. "Not at all." He looked at Shinji, his expression grave. "The recovery process failed because she didn't want to return."
Shinji froze, his mouth open slightly in shock. He shook himself. "That doesn't make sense," he whispered. "Why wouldn't she want to come back?"
Fuyutsuki smiled at him sadly. "Your mother entered the Evangelion of her own free will," he said. He closed his eyes, remembering. "The Contact Experiment wasn't a failure," he said. "It went exactly as she planned. Gendo didn't understand this, and he wanted to retrieve her. But his plans and hers did not align."
Shinji's eyes widened. "Her plans," he said. "What plans? What was she after?" There was a touch of panic in his voice.
Fuyutsuki smiled sympathetically. "Your mother was a brave woman," he said. "But to understand why, it helps to know something of the beings who created us."
Shinji stopped, taken aback. "The beings who . . . ?" he trailed off.
Fuyutsuki nodded. "We call them the First Ancestral Race," he said, "The creators of Adam and Lilith, and several more besides," he went on. "There were seven in all, each destined for a different world."
Shinji's eyes glazed over. "What are you talking about?" he asked, incredulous. "Aliens? People who aren't human?"
Fuyutsuki smiled. "Ah, but they were human. The first humans, in fact."
Shinji thought back to the day of Third Impact, to the time Misato told him the Angels themselves were human. "So they had human souls, then? Like us?"
Fuyutsuki nodded, then waved a hand dismissively. "But the details of their broader plan are not important. What is important is the fact that, for whatever reason, two of these beings, these Seeds of Life, accidentally wound up on Earth."
"Accidentally?" Shinji asked.
Fuyutsuki nodded. "Correct. This was supposed to be Adam's world," he said. "Lilith -- the being who created us -- was originally destined for another world." He smiled grimly. "But there was an error. We don't know how, but for some reason she was sent here along with Adam."
"I . . . " Shinji began, his earlier discomfort briefly forgotten in the face of this new absurdity. "How the hell do you make a mistake like that?"
Fuyutsuki shrugged. "As I said, we don't have the details. What we do know is that only one of these progenitor beings was permitted to exist on any given world. As such, our ancestors paired each of these beings with a weapon, the Lance of Longinus, which was designed to ensure that their plans would be executed properly."
Shinji scowled, bristling at the notion of what constituted "properly".
"But," Fuyutsuki went on, "Lilith's arrival on Earth was very traumatic; that impact wound up creating our moon, and it's possible Lilith's Lance was lost in the process." He shook his head absently. "Regardless of the reason, the Lance accompanying Adam elected to incapacitate him, leaving Lilith free to fulfill her directive." Fuyutsuki smiled ironically. "Of course, when Seele woke Adam in 2000, the event that would come to be known as Second Impact, he was once again free to fulfill his own directive. But we destroyed him before he could do so, and in the process created the being you knew as Kaworu Nagisa."
Shinji's breath caught. "Kaworu?" he asked.
Fuyutsuki nodded. "Yes."
"Kaworu . . . " Shinji trailed off, remembering. He sighed. His earlier discomfort returned, and forgotten pain besides. "Ayanami, and Kaworu. They--"
Fuyutsuki frowned, concerned by the pain in the young man's eyes. He held up a hand. "Please, Mr. Ikari," he said. "Don't think too harshly of them." He smiled sadly. "Their actions were not altogether their own."
Shinji frowned in confusion. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"Those two were avatars of the First Ancestral Race, and as such were Seeds of Life," Fuyutsuki said. "Their core directives, their need to create new life, took precedence over all other concerns, including their own personal desires."
Shinji shook his head. "But Kaworu said--"
Fuyutsuki nodded. "I am aware of what he said. But you should know that his intent was to preserve the will of the First Ancestral Race, and to ensure that their efforts on this planet continued as they originally intended. Seele bent that intent to their will, using it to manipulate him, to force him to do their bidding after he denied them during Second Impact." He levelled his gaze at Shinji, reassuring the man. "But then he met you," he said, "and everything changed."
Shinji swallowed thickly. "But the Angels and the Lilin couldn't live together . . . "
Fuyutsuki sighed. "Yes," he said, "that was the difficulty. Lilith had fulfilled her directive, and yet this was supposed to be Adam's world. The conflict thus created was incommensurable. In the end, Kaworu yielded to Lilith's will, at great personal sacrifice. And that was where Yui came in."
Shinji raised his head. "Mother?"
Fuyutsuki nodded. "Yes. Your mother chose to take on the burden of Adam, and through the form of the Evangelion fulfill his directive elsewhere." He smiled at Shinji. "She didn't abandon you," he said. "Rather, she chose to accept a sacred obligation, one beyond human comprehension. You should be proud of her," he went on. "Her devotion to duty and to her ideals was very admirable."
Shinji sat back, reeling. "That's why she left?" he whispered.
Fuyutsuki frowned. "Mr. Ikari--" he said, extending a hand.
Shinji stood, grabbing the table to steady himself. He was shaking, and could barely stand. He managed to bow to Fuyutsuki, bestowing the proper respect upon an elder. "Thank you for your insight, sir," he said, his voice wavering.
Fuyutsuki's eyes widened. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to upset you--"
"It's fine," Shinji lied, interrupting him. "Please, sir," he asked, "may I go now?"
Fuyutsuki hesitated a moment, then nodded, his lips a thin line. "As you will," he said.
When Shinji exited the building, Asuka had only to glance at him to know that something was very wrong. "What is it?" she asked him.
He stared at her. "Mother," he said. "She . . . I . . . " He turned to Misato. "I'd like to go home now, if that's alright."
Misato looked him over, worry in her eyes. "Okay," she said.
Asuka preceded him in the back seat, then turned to him when he joined her. "Are you alright?" she whispered.
He shook his head. "I don't think so, 'Suka. Not right now."
She bit her lip. "Alright," she said. She took his shoulders, coaxing him to lay his head in her lap. "It'll be okay," she said, trying to keep her voice calm and soothing. "I'll take care of you."
He nodded, wrapping his arms around himself. He didn't reply.
They were silent as Misato drove them home.