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Ghosts of Evangelion - a post-EoE fic by Bagheera

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Bagheera:
Much happiness. Brace yourselves, folks! Ryuko's gonna take you on a ride . . .

August 12, 2046

(click to show/hide)August 12, 2046

The girl awoke when she heard a shout from the room next door. Ryuko Ikari Soryu sighed, then dragged her pillow over her head. "Jeez, mom," she said. "Give it a rest." She looked at the clock sitting beside her futon: 6:18 a.m. She blew out a breath, then dragged herself out of bed and started getting dressed. When she finished she grabbed her drumsticks and headed out the door.
As she passed her parents' room, she spied her mother and father through the open door. He held her close, and she looked very small, clutching at him in the wake of her nightmare. Ryuko sighed again. She caught her father's eye, then pointed toward the front door. He nodded, and she made her way there. She grabbed her skateboard and left the building.
Once she hit the sidewalk she hopped on her skateboard, picking up speed as she headed for school. She thought about the drum solo she planned to practice today, hoping the other band members wouldn't be too boring to let her cut loose. But at least with a drum kit she could cut loose. With a violin or a cello it was out of the question. "Fucking heathens," she said. "My dad's the only one who gets it. I'm probably the only kid in Japan who can say that."
She crested a hill and really began to pour on the speed, passing pedestrians left and right as she did so. They cursed at her, but she paid them no mind -- she wanted to fly, and to hell with anyone who didn't get that! The hill bottomed out and she started to slow down, coming into a more populated area, but she was too late -- a man came out of a store right as she passed in front of it. Her eyes widened as she realized avoiding him was impossible, and she spread herself wide to limit the damage. But even so she plowed into him at full speed, sending both of them flying.
She landed hard. "Ow!" she said. "Owowowow!" She picked herself up from the ground, taking stock of the damage. Her head was alright, as were her elbows and knees -- she'd have to thank Misato once again for the protective gear -- but she had a nasty scrape along her forearm. Ah well; she'd had worse. But the other guy . . .
"Hey," she said. "Are you alright?" She took off her helmet, then scooted over to get a closer look at him. Her breath caught: Shoulder length frosted hair, light brown skin, strong cheekbones, soft brown eyes. She blinked, then shook herself. "Shit," she muttered. "Shitshitshit. Mom is gonna kill me . . . "
He groaned as he sat up. "Fuckin' A," he said. "What the hell is wrong with you, you lunatic? I feel like I just got hit by a truck."
She cringed. "Sorry!" she said. "I'm really sorry! I caught some speed and I got carried away and I didn't see you . . . " She broke off. "Should I call an ambulance?" she asked.
"I don't need a fuckin' ambulance," he said. He stood up, wobbling a bit as he did so. "You're lucky I can take a hit, man. What if I was an old lady or a kid or something? You could have killed me!"
She squeezed her eyes shut, nodding emphatically as he lectured her. "You're right," she said. "I'm really sorry, you're right, you're right."
Her ready acceptance of blame cooled his anger a bit. "Fuck, that hurt," he said.
"Are you sure you're alright?" she asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine," he said. "Just be more careful next time. I mean, damn . . . "
She breathed a sigh of relief. "Good," she said. "Then, um . . . I'll get going, I guess." She retrieved her skateboard, then checked her pockets. Her eyes went wide. "Oh, shit," she said. "Where are my sticks?"
"Huh?" he asked. "Sticks?"
"Yeah, my drumsticks. They were in my back pocket . . . " She looked around, spotting them halfway down the block. "There they are!" She hurried to retrieve them. She looked back one last time and then started walking in the direction of her school, opting to carry the board for the time being.
He looked after her, watching her for a moment. Then, with a muttered curse, he hurried to catch up to her. "Hey," he said.
She shot him a nervous look.
"Sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to be so harsh. It just took me by surprise, that's all. But I'm not hurt, so I don't need to be a jerk about it."
"Okay," she said. "Thanks."
"You really should be more careful, though."
She flushed. "Right," she said.
They walked in silence for a few moments. "So, you play the drums?" he asked
"Yeah," she said. "I'm on my way to school to practice with my band."
"Eh?" he asked. "But we're on summer break. Why are you going to school?"
"We have a key to the music room," she explained. "So we meet up there to practice. It's easier than trying to arrange locations every time, you know?"
He nodded. "I guess that makes sense," he said. He thought for a moment, then grinned. "Are you any good?"
She laughed nervously. "Well, I guess that depends on who you ask. When I was at nationals last year the crowd went apeshit over my playing, but one of the judges called my performance an offense to music itself." She scratched her head self-consciously. "That was with the violin, though; I don't compete with the drums."
"Oh wow," he said. "So you play two instruments? That's impressive."
She shrugged. "The drums are just for fun," she explained. "I do bass and keyboards too, but I only compete with violin, cello and piano." She frowned. "I also play the flute, but I have nothing to do with it. We don't use it in the band and I don't feel like competing with it, so it's kind of a useless skill."
He shook his head. "Jeez, man," he said. "You sound like some kind of musical prodigy or something."
She grinned. "Yup! And I skateboard and I kick ass at gaming and I write poetry, too. I'm kinda awesome!"
He laughed. "And so humble!" he said.
She crossed her arms, sticking out her chin. "False modesty is condescending to others," she said. "It's better to recognize others' virtues than to downplay your own. That way you can help them out and still get the credit you deserve!"
He glanced at her sidelong. "You must be a foreigner," he said, a touch of disdain in his voice. "No Japanese would ever think like that."
She laughed. "What can I say?" she said. "I'm not a conventional girl."
He looked her up and down. It was a fair assessment: half her head was shaved to stubble, while the other half had shoulder length dark hair dyed a deep lavender at the ends. She had a barbell in her upper ear, a stud in her nostril, and another barbell in her tongue. She wore a tight t-shirt full of holes, raggedy jeans, and a pair of Vans on her feet, all stretched over a wiry athletic frame. She was striking, to be sure, but by no means conventional. He sighed. "Yeah, I can see your point," he said. "But even so, you don't look Japanese."
"Ha!" she said. "Yeah, that's true. My mom is American, actually, so that's why." She frowned. "Though it's weird; she was born here, but then grew up in Germany, and her mother was German/Japanese, and I'm pretty sure she's never even been to America. But her dad was American, so . . . " She shrugged. "Eh, whatever. Anyway, she's crazy smart and went through some heavy shit as a kid, so she kind of has a 'fuck you!' attitude to most anything that gets in her way. I guess she passed that on to me, but I don't have her baggage so I'm a little more constructive about it."
"Heh." He nodded. "That does explain a few things."
"Yeah," she said. Her eyes widened. "Oh!" she said, fishing out her phone. "I almost forgot. Can I get your contact info?"
He blinked. "Huh?" he asked. "Why would you need that?"
"Duh," she said, grinning. "You're kinda hot. I might wanna ask you out or something."
He laughed at her. "Are you for real?" he asked. "You just ran into me."
She frowned. "Well, yes . . . "
"With a skateboard. You ran into me with a skateboard!"
"I said I was sorry . . . " she mumbled.
"And now you're asking me out?" he continued, incredulous.
"Is that a 'no', then?" she asked.
"Well . . . " he paused. He looked her up and down again, then shook his head and laughed. "You're something else," he said. He looked her in the eye. "What if I have a girlfriend or something?" he asked, a mischievous smile playing about his lips.
Her eyes widened, and she looked stricken. "Then I'd be sad," she said. She looked away, then met his gaze again. "Um, do you?"
He looked at her, then laughed. "Not at the moment," he admitted.
She grinned. "Great!" she said. She held her phone before her, looking at him expectantly.
He stared at her for a moment, then laughed despite himself. "Fine," he said. "Why not?"
They exchanged data. When they finished, Ryuko smiled happily. "Thanks!" she said.
"Sure." He looked at his phone's screen, then frowned. "Wait," he said.
"Soryu? As in Asuka Langley Soryu?"
She nodded proudly. "Yup! She's my mom."
"Ah," he said. He coughed nervously.
She cocked her head. "Problem?" she asked.
"Not exactly," he said. "It's just that . . . well, my grandfather was Katsuhiro Nakamura. He was the commander of the JSSDF's 4th Division."
She frowned. "Oh." She sighed. "Well, I can see how that might make you a bit nervous, but most of the people my mom has met from the 4th have been pretty chill. She let all that shit go a long time ago, so unless you have a grudge or something it shouldn't be a problem."
He shook his head. "No grudge here," he said. He grinned. "That's a relief," he said. "I was nervous for a minute there."
She quirked an eyebrow. "Oh?" she asked.
He laughed. "Well, you're also kinda hot," he said.
She laughed in delight, blushing at the jab. They reached the street corner, and he turned right. "I'm going this way," he said.
She nodded. "Okay," she said. "See ya, Kenji! I'll call you Friday!"
"Sure," he said.
She took off, letting out a whoop of joy as she did so. He could only shake his head and laugh as he continued on his way.

Ryuko crossed the threshold to her apartment. "I'm home!" she said.
"Welcome home," Asuka said. She caught sight of her daughter's forearm, and her eyes snapped to hers. "And what the hell happened to you?" she asked.
Ryuko laughed self-consciously. "Um, I ran into someone on the way to school." She fidgeted. "Like, literally."
Asuka closed her eyes. "Christ, Ryuko." She sighed, then asked, "Are you alright?"
Ryuko nodded. "Yes," she said. "And before you ask, so is he."
"Are you sure?" Asuka asked.
Ryuko nodded emphatically. "Yes!" she said. "You can ask him yourself come Friday."
"Do I even want to know?" Asuka asked.
Ryuko laughed. "I kinda asked him out."
"Of course you did," Asuka said, sighing.
"Wait," Shinji asked. "You hit him with a skateboard, and then . . . asked him out?"
" . . . Yes?" Ryuko said. She laughed self-consciously. "I think he was so surprised by my audacity that it didn't occur to him to say no."
"Well, you have no shortage of that," Asuka muttered. "Unbelievable." She glared at Shinji in accusation.
"What?" he said. "I think that's cool."
She made grasping motions with her hands. "You're Japanese," she said. "How can you possibly think that's cool? It doesn't make sense!"
"I live with you," he said. "How could I not think it's cool?"
She flushed, then sighed. "Even so," she said, "she has enough of an attitude problem as it is. You shouldn't encourage her."
Ryuko grinned. "My attitude is awesome," she said. She turned toward Shinji. "Thanks, Dad. High five!" Shinji chuckled and indulged her. "I'm gonna go play some vidya," she said. "Don't lose your shit while I'm gone." She wandered off to her room, leaving her parents irritated and bemused in her stead.
"I'm going to go do . . . something," Asuka said. "Something to make me less irritated." She glared at Shinji. "It's your turn to make dinner."
Shinji frowned. "But the schedule says--" he began.
"You don't understand," she said, interrupting. "It's. Your. Turn."
Shinji sighed. "Of course it is," he said. "Fine, fine. But you better make it up to me!"
"Hmph." Asuka tossed her head and stalked off toward their room.

After dinner, Ryuko found Asuka in her room. She was hunched in front of her laptop, typing away. "Um . . . " Ryuko began.
Asuka spared her daughter a glance, then returned to the screen in front of her. "What do you want?" she asked.
Ryuko bit her lip nervously. "Well," she began, "um . . . "
Asuka's brows knit in irritation.
Ryuko squeezed her eyes shut. "You were pretty fucked up this morning!" she blurted out.
"Yeah, so?" Asuka said.
"I'm the reason for that, aren't I?" Ryuko asked.
Asuka stared at her, perplexed. "Why would you think that?" she asked. "It's about piloting, it's nothing to do with you. Don't be so egotistical."
Ryuko's fists shot to her sides. "I'm not being egotistical!" she said. "I'm part of it, I know it!"
"Eh?" Asuka asked, taken aback.
"I talked to Misato about it," Ryuko said. "Heishiro, too. They both told me you were fine before I was born. That you went months without a nightmare or whatever. Now you have them all the time! And it's not just you!" she went on. "They said dad was doing okay before I was born, that he was almost normal, but once I came along it was like ten years of progress went out the window."
Asuka narrowed her eyes. "Is that what they said?" she asked.
Ryuko nodded. "And don't you dare get mad at them!" she said. "They just told me the truth."
"So what if they did?" Asuka asked. "What of it?"
"I want to know why," Ryuko said. "I want to know why I hurt you so much." She frowned. "You and dad."
Asuka sighed. "Look," she said, "it has nothing to do with you personally. That's the truth. It's just . . . " She frowned, then shook her head. "It's complicated, okay? And besides, it doesn't really matter now--"
"It matters to me!" Ryuko exclaimed. "I saw you this morning, mom. You were in so much pain . . . " She swallowed thickly, then continued. "I just want to understand why," she said. "That's all. I just want to understand."
Asuka stared at her daughter for a time, then sighed. "Fine," she said. She opened up her laptop, then navigated to a particular folder. "This has everything you could ever want to know about piloting," she said. "If you want to know what happened to us, look here."
Ryuko  moved around the laptop, eager to see what Asuka had in store for her.
Asuka looked at her daughter warily. "But don't forget your place!" she said. "Your father and I have dealt with this for years, so remember that when you watch this."
Ryuko nodded, then started to watch the files.
Asuka frowned, then shook her head. "Obstinate little fool," she muttered. "You're just like your father." She sighed, then left the room.

Ryuko clutched her head with shaking hands, trying to purge her mind of the horrors she'd just witnessed.
"Oh, come on," Asuka said, entering the room. "It's not that bad."
Ryuko just stared at her, slack jawed. "How can you say that?" she asked, on the verge of hysteria. "Dad was boiled alive, they sent you into a goddamn volcano! And the fifteenth . . . oh, my God." She hugged herself, rocking back and forth. "You said it was defiling you, that it was . . . it was . . . " She shook her head. "I can't even imagine it. And they left you there, and they--"
"Hey!" Asuka snapped. Ryuko jerked, then met her gaze. "Get one thing straight, kid -- I hurt myself there. They had no control over the Evas, and I wasn't even supposed to sortie that day. I'm the one who jumped into battle, and I'm the one who refused to retreat. Misato ordered me to pull back, but I wouldn't listen." She shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't like admitting it, but what happened to me that day was my fault."
Ryuko shook her head. "That's insane!" she said. "You were a kid, mom! You shouldn't have even been out there! You should have been studying, and chasing boys, and . . . and . . . " She shuddered. "Aren't there rules against that? Against using kids in battle?"
Asuka sighed. "What do rules matter when the fate of humanity is at stake? Put things in perspective, Ryuko! Do you think Misato wanted to do that? Do you think she liked it?"
"No, but--"
"But what?" Asuka asked. "It was a shitty situation, and she handled it as best she could. When she figured out what was really going on she did what she could to stop it, but she didn't have many options at that point."
"How can you be so forgiving?" Ryuko mumbled.
Asuka cocked her head. "It was more than thirty years ago, for one thing," she said sardonically. "And, more importantly, she went to a lot of trouble to make amends."
Ryuko shook her head. "I can't believe she'd let them do that to you," she said. "It's unforgiveable! It's--"
Asuka rolled her eyes. "Quit being so melodramatic," she said. "Your father and I are the ones who were hurt by this, not you. Let us deal with it as we see fit and mind your own business."
Ryuko closed her eyes. "But--" she began.
"'But?'" Asuka asked, crossing her arms. "You're going to cause problems even though you weren't involved?"
"Well--" Ryuko began. She squirmed in her seat, suddenly uncomfortable. "I mean, no, it's not really my place, but even so--"
"Even so?" Asuka asked. Her voice was level, but the hint of menace in it was unmistakable.
Ryuko sucked in a breath, forcing herself to meet her mother's gaze. "You're not the only one who feels protective!" she said. "And I . . . I have to live with it too, you know! I don't suffer like you do, but . . . but . . . "
Asuka smiled at her, then relented. "I know," she said, hugging the girl. "You're just like your father that way. But don't worry; Misato's on our side. She's done everything for us since Third Impact." She grinned at her daughter. "And that includes helping us raise you!"
Ryuko made a face. "I still don't get how I fit into all of this," she said.
Asuka shrugged. "Who knows? Raising a child is stressful, and stress is what triggers it; that's why Misato and Kaji wouldn't let us do it until you were older." She frowned thoughtfully. "Hmmm. That's interesting, now that I think about it. I guess they wanted to make sure we wouldn't strangle you or something."
Ryuko's eyes went wide. "Eh?" she asked.
"Sorry," Asuka said. "Bad joke. Ask your father about it sometime. But anyway, for a while, your dad and I didn't have to worry about anything. But then you were born, and . . . " she shrugged.
Ryuko frowned. "So it is about me," she said.
Asuka shrugged. "Sort of. But don't worry about it. You're a good kid, so you're worth the trouble." She tugged a lock of Ryuko's hair. "Even if you are a delinquent."
Ryuko sighed, and her mother laughed and hugged her again.

Bagheera:
So, Asuka has a good day for a change:

August 13, 2046

(click to show/hide)August 13, 2046

Shinji's jaw dropped as he stared at the TV in disbelief. "Oh, my God!" he said. "We did it!"
Asuka threw down her controller and tackled him in a tight hug. "Wahoo!" she shouted. "Most days you piss me off, Third, but some days you are well and truly awesome. Today is one of those days!"
Shinji laughed at her exuberance. "Thanks, Asuka," he said. "I think you're awesome too."
"I am always awesome," she said, preening. "But today, you get to share in my glory! Nice work!"
Shinji's response was cut off when Ryuko opened the door to her room. "What are you two shouting about?" she mumbled. She wandered in, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders, and wiped the sleep from her eyes.
Asuka stood up and smirked at her. "Skyreach," she said, planting her hands on her hips. "Co-op mode, Nightmare difficulty."
Ryuko scowled at her. "Impossible," she said. "You can't even play on Nightmare difficulty without a sync kit, and you wouldn't let us get one."
Asuka pointed to the TV with a flourish. "Read it and weep, little girl," she said.
Ryuko shuffled over to the TV, peering at the display. Her eyes went wide. "Impossible," she whispered. "That's not-- it's just impossible!" She gave the TV screen a closer look, and her eyes went wide. "Mom, do you realize what you've done?"
"Hah!" Asuka said. "Your father and I have proven we're magnificent, that's what!"
Ryuko shook her head. "No, I mean . . . you didn't just beat the game," she said. "You ranked! You got the third highest score in Japan!"
Asuka blinked. "Whoa," she said. "Really?"
Ryuko nodded. "Once the score is verified it will be posted to the leaderboards, and everyone will know."
Asuka's eyes widened in alarm. "Posted?" she asked. "But it's a private game, not a competition--"
"You're on the network, mom. Everyone's scores are ranked, whether they're competing or not."
Asuka scowled. "Don't we get a say in this?"
Ryuko shrugged. "We had the chance to opt out," she said.
"What?" Asuka asked. "When?"
"When we registered the console," Ryuko said. "Don't you remember? We talked about it, and you decided we'd . . . "
Shinji groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We decided we'd opt in so you could compete with your friends. I remember now." He frowned. "But they'll just post our usernames, right?"
Ryuko just stared at her father. "Your usernames are 'Reddevil' and 'Bakashin', dad. People will work it out."
Asuka laughed nervously. "Whoops," she said. Then she shrugged. "Eh, who cares? People rank all the time, it's no big deal--"
"You don't get it," Ryuko said, shaking her head. "Games with sync are ranked separately from games without. If you look at the leaderboards sync games will have a red dot next to them. Non-synced games don't. You just beat a game that requires sync without using it. People are gonna wanna know how."
Asuka frowned. "It's not actually required, you know. It's just--"
Asuka's reply was cut short by a chirp from her phone. She read the message, then said "oh wow. It's from Sony. 'Thank you for using our Dios platform! We thought you'd like to know we have received several inquiries regarding your recent high score for the game Skyreach. As per our policy we will not share your private data with third parties without your express written consent. However, should you choose to use us as an intermediary we will be glad to provide assistance. Alternatively, you may wish to contact these parties independently at your convenience. Please let us know if we can be of further help.'"
"Holy crap," Ryuko said. "Seriously?"
Asuka nodded. "That's what it says."
"Wow, that was quick," Ryuko said. She sighed. "I'm gonna be the only kid in Japan whose parents are better at vidya than she is."
"Only in co-op," Shinji said. "You still destroy us in individual rankings."
"Not the point, dad," Ryuko lamented.
Asuka shook her head. "Irrelevant," she said. She stabbed a finger at Shinji. "We have done the impossible. As a reward, I demand breakfast!"
Shinji laughed at her. "Fine, fine," he said. "What would you like?"
She grinned at him. "Waffles!"
Shinji rolled his eyes. "Of course," he said. "Waffles it is." He wandered off to the kitchen, and began his cooking.
Asuka relaxed on the couch. She smiled at Ryuko. "I'm just gonna sit here being awesome," she said. "But I'm merciful. You may bask in my radiance if you wish."
Ryuko laughed at her mother, then made her way to the kitchen.
Shinji stood before the stove, a broad smile on his face. He caught her eye as she entered. "And that," he said, indicating Asuka, "is why I bother."
"Heh. It's nice to see her happy for a change." Her brows knit. "I still wanna know how you did it, though."
Shinji shrugged as he poured batter into the waffle iron. "It's not impossible," he said, "just difficult. Your mother and I have a lot of training with synchronization, so we have an advantage other people don't. That's all it is, really; nothing complicated about it."
Ryuko quirked an eyebrow, skeptical. "So piloting made you awesome gamers?"
"I wouldn't put it like that," he said. "But one Angel--" he counted on his fingers, then nodded -- "the seventh, I think, could split itself in two. We had to hit both of its cores simultaneously to defeat it, and we trained for a solid week to learn to sync with one another and coordinate our efforts."
Ryuko rolled her eyes. "That was nearly thirty years ago, dad. What does that have to do with the here and now?"
Shinji shrugged. "Nothing by itself, but that was just the beginning. After Third Impact gaming became a crucial part of our lives; playing games in co-op mode gave us a way to support one another, and we very much needed that at the time." He smiled sadly. "We really didn't like one another much back then. But anyway, when civilization came back we continued out of habit, and it soon became a sort of tradition. That and my playing the cello for her were the main ways we cemented our bond."
"But when?" Ryuko pressed. "I never see you guys playing anything. Heck, I didn't even know you'd ever touched Skyreach until today!"
Shinji narrowed his eyes in a mock glare. "That's because we're considerate," he said. "We play when you're asleep or at school, because we don't want to get in your way."
Ryuko flushed. "Oh," she said. "Well, um . . . thanks, I guess."
"You're welcome," Shinji said. He opened the waffle iron and scooped out the waffle inside, placing it on a plate before lathering it with butter and syrup. He handed the plate to Ryuko and said, "Here, take this to your mother. Yours is up next."
She accepted the plate, nodding eagerly. "Okay!" she said.
As always, feedback welcome!

Bagheera:
So, new sequence of chapters. They're not tied to one date, but they're all thematically linked. I have no idea as to how I'll link to them in the OP. But, hopefully you like them:

July 7, 8 & 9, 2046

(click to show/hide)July 7, 2046

Asuka winced as she heard the same drum beats for the 43rd time in a row. "I've had enough of this," she said.
Shinji held out a hand, pleading for patience. "Asuka, wait--" he began.
"Shut up," she said. She strode into their storeroom, filled to the brim with musical equipment. She spied the girl behind her drums, and noted that her hands were covered with blood. She grabbed the girl's arm. "What's this?" she demanded.
Ryuko tugged at her hand. "It's not right yet," she said.
"Eh?" Asuka asked.
"The sound," Ryuko explained. "It's not right yet."
"I don't care," Asuka said. "You're done for the night."
"Mother, please--" the girl began.
"Please what? I said you're done. You can play games or something instead, but no more of this."
Ryuko mewled in frustration. "Mom, you're so annoying! It's not right--"
"You've finished composing it, yes?" Asuka said.
"Yes, but--" Ryuko began.
"Then you're done. All that's left now is practice, and you can do that tomorrow after your hands have recovered."
Ryuko fidgeted. "But--"
Asuka tightened her grip on the girl's arm. "But what?" she asked.
"Ow!" Ryuko wailed. "Mama, you're hurting me!"
Asuka's grip slackened, but only a bit. "You're hurting yourself, and I won't have it!"
"Let me go!" Ryuko wailed. She tugged at her arm, and Asuka released her. She rubbed her wrist, glaring at her mother. "You suck!" she said. She stomped off to her room, powering up her Dios console in a huff as her mother looked on.

July 8, 2046

Ryuko crossed the threshold to her home, closing the door behind her. "I'm home," she mumbled.
Asuka, standing before the kitchen counter, turned around, crossing her arms as she did so. She took in her daughter's appearance: helmet, elbow and knee pads, fresh scrapes on her forearms and legs, nothing too serious. "And where have you been?" she asked.
Ryuko removed her helmet, then started on the rest of her gear. "At the skate park."
Asuka quirked an eyebrow. "For ten hours?"
Ryuko shrugged.
"I would have thought you'd be practicing," Asuka said.
"Yeah, well . . . " the girl said.
"You seemed keen on it last night," Asuka noted. "What changed?"
Ryuko frowned. "I dunno. I guess I just wanted to think about it a bit."
Asuka tapped her chin. "And so you decided to skate for ten hours."
"So what?" Ryuko said, glaring at her mother. "What's wrong with that?"
Asuka held up a hand. "Nothing, nothing at all. It's just interesting, that's all."
Ryuko picked up her gear. "Whatever. I'm going to my room."
"No," Asuka said. She indicated a chair at the kitchen table. "Sit."
"Why?" the girl asked. "I didn't do anything--"
"You're not in trouble," Asuka said. "I just need to talk to you for a bit."
Ryuko glowered at her, but did as she was told.
Once the girl was seated Asuka crossed her arms again. "When you went to regionals last year . . . did you enjoy it?"
Ryuko blinked. "Huh?"
"Was the question unclear?" Asuka asked mildly.
"No, I just . . . " Ryuko shook herself. "I dunno. It was fine, I guess."
"Hmmm," Asuka said.
Ryuko frowned, thinking. "I liked playing on stage. It was fun to connect with people, to have them enjoy my music." Her expression darkened. "Except for that one judge. I can't believe he said that about me!"
Asuka waved a hand dismissively. "Never mind him, he's an idiot. What else?"
Ryuko sighed. "Apart from actually playing . . . I guess I didn't like it much. Everyone was stressed, and critical and stuff, and it wasn't very fun."
Asuka nodded. "Would you want to do it again?"
"Not really," Ryuko said, shaking her head. "I'd rather perform at a club, or at school or something. Some place where people aren't busy competing with each other, and are just there to have a good time."
"Is that all?" Asuka asked.
Ryuko cocked her head. "What do you mean?"
"Is that all you want?" Asuka pressed.
"I . . . " The girl fidgeted. "I guess so. I mean, yeah, that's all I want."
Asuka was silent for a moment. Then she said, "your father got a call a few days ago. It seems an instructor from a music conservatory in Kyoto saw your performance, and wants to invite you to his school. Your father agreed to meet with him. When I learned of this I called him an idiot, and informed him that I would be meeting with the man instead."
Ryuko gulped. "Why is that?" she asked.
"Because your father's soft when it comes to you," Asuka replied. "When he hears flowery words of praise he might give in and make decisions that aren't necessarily in your best interest. I don't have that problem." Her eyes narrowed. "But I'm not quite sure what your best interests are just yet, which is why I'm talking to you now."
Ryuko stared at the floor, recognizing the gravity of the situation. "Okay," she said.
"Do you love music?" her mother asked.
Ryuko nodded. "Of course!"
"Would you give up skateboarding for it? Or jujutsu?"
Ryuko frowned. "Why would I have to--"
"The conservatories don't care about how talented you are," her mother explained. "Whether you're mediocre or gifted, they will push you to your absolute limits to bring out your full potential. And in your case, that potential is considerable."
"What do you mean?" Ryuko asked.
"You are extraordinary, Ryuko," her mother said. "You do things casually that most people only master with a lifetime of experience. With the proper training you could become a true legend, someone who could change the way music is made and experienced around the world. But you would have to commit to it totally to make that happen; the casual way you're approaching it now won't get you anywhere."
"But I don't want to get anywhere!" Ryuko said. She folded her hands behind her neck, resting her elbows on the table. "I just want to play. That's all I want. I just want to play."
"You don't want fame?" her mother pressed, "or recognition? You could be the next Charlie Parker, you know."
Ryuko glanced up at her mother. "Charlie Parker practiced for 15 hours a day and died of a heroin overdose when he was in his 30s. I don't want that. I just want to make music. I just want to play."
Asuka was not yet convinced. "You could learn a lot at a music school, you know. They have all sorts of workshops for composing and improvisation and such, and you could meet people and make connections. It could be a great experience--"
"I don't want to go to a music school!" Ryuko yelled. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened them she said, "I make connections at school and at clubs. I learn from other people. I don't need a school for that, and I don't want to go somewhere that will make playing miserable for me. I don't care if I'm great; as long as I'm having fun that's good enough for me."
"Is that really what you want?" Asuka asked. "Are you certain? You'd be giving up an awful lot. This is a big deal, Ryuko. Think carefully before you answer."
Ryuko reeled at that. "That's unfair, mom. How am I supposed to answer that?"
Asuka shrugged. "The offer came, and I'm describing it to you as best I can. Yes, it's unfair, but it is what it is. What do you want to do?"
Ryuko closed her eyes, thinking hard. Then she opened them and met her mother's gaze. "I don't want to go to a music school," she said. "I'm not sure what I want to do with my life, but I'm certain I don't want that."
Asuka looked at her daughter for a long moment, then shrugged. "Fine," she said. "I'll tell the guy to fuck off, then."
Ryuko breathed a sigh of relief. "Thanks, mom." She scratched her cheek. "You know, I don't get you. Sometimes you're really cool like this, and others you're a total bitch. What's up with that?"
Asuka reared back in surprise, then glared at her daughter. "Be glad you get bits of nice on occasion," she grumbled. "Ask your father what it's like when I'm mean 24/7. You don't know how lucky you are."
Ryuko scrutinized her mother, her chin in her hand. "Sure I do," she said. "You love me more than anything, and you love dad just as much. But that doesn't stop you from treating us both like dogshit on occasion."
Asuka crossed her arms defensively. "Shut up, you idiot! I'm doing the best I can. I--"
"Bullshit!" Ryuko said. "'The best you can,' you say? Whatever. Today you were fine. I felt like you were an actual parent for a change, and that was nice. But last night? Fuck that noise. Back in the day I guess you could get away with it, since things were really rough for you back then. But now, not so much. We deserve better, father and I, and so do you!"
Asuka just stared at her daughter, her mouth hanging open. "You little brat," she whispered. "Not even your father talks to me that way."
"Tch," Ryuko spat. "He calls you out on your bullshit all the time. Misato does, too. I'm not an idiot, mom; I see what's going on around me. How the hell would I have the nerve to speak up otherwise?"
Asuka blinked and was silent for a moment, before she erupted into laughter. This went on for several seconds, after which she circled the table and wrapped an arm around her daughter's shoulders. "You stupid little brat!" she said, grinding a knuckle into Ryuko's head. "I'm glad to see you take after your father in ways other than musical talent!"
"Cut it out, mom!" Ryuko said, struggling against both the hug and the knuckle. "Jeez, you're embarrassing me!"
Asuka just laughed at the girl, holding her fast and kissing her cheek. "I'm proud of you, little girl. I truly am."
"You're missing the point!" Ryuko wailed, enduring the rough treatment as best she could. "Gah! Where is dad when I need him?"

July 9, 2046

Asuka looked up at the knock on her door. "Come in," she said.
A man entered, an older, pudgy sort, radiating an aura of entitlement. She quickly recognized him as an individual who was used to getting what he wanted. "Good afternoon, Ms. Soryu," he said.
"Hello," she replied, standing to greet him. She bowed before him, then said, "I made tea. Would you like some?"
"Yes, that would be lovely," he said. He sat, and she poured him some tea.
"You're here to discuss my daughter, yes?" she asked.
He took a sip of her tea, then nodded pleasantly. "Indeed. She is quite talented, as I'm sure you know, and it would be my privilege to give her a venue to express her abilities to the fullest. I think you'll find my conservatory has no equal in that regard."
Asuka nodded. "Well, obviously," she said, sitting down. "I'm not an idiot, after all. Your programs on foreign music trends and improvisation workshops are right up her alley. I said as much to Ryuko when I tried to convince her to attend your school."
"Ah," he said. "I take it she is reluctant, then?"
Asuka shrugged. "She's stubborn. I asked her directly last night, and she made her position very clear."
He frowned. "That is often the case with children," he said. "They need to be pushed to find the limits of their potential. Surely you realize this?"
She smiled thinly. "Mister Director, do you know who I am?"
He balked. "Of course, Lady Soryu. I think everyone does."
"Tch," she said. "Because of that rat Aida, no doubt."
He shrugged, a useless gesture.
"Do you know what I was doing when I was my daughter's age?" she asked.
He shifted uncomfortably. "You were fighting the Angels, on behalf of all of humanity," he said.
"No," she said, a wry grin playing about her lips, "not quite. On the day of Third Impact I was medically sedated, having tried to slit my wrists days prior. This because I had been drummed out of Nerv's service, having been deemed no longer useful by the powers that be."
He gulped. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize-"
"No," she said, "of course you wouldn't. But anyway, later that morning the love of my life used me as a masturbation aide." She met his gaze directly. "Like I said, I was sedated at the time, so it's not like I had a say in the matter. Later I woke up, only to find the JSSDF was pelting my Eva with depth charges, and then I had to fight and kill other people if I wanted to survive. After that I was torn to pieces by other Evas. Quite the morning, no?"
He looked around, unsure how to react.
"But it got worse from there," she said. "Later on that same love of my life strangled me to death."
He opened his mouth to speak and then snapped it shut, staring at her in confusion.
She shrugged. "What can I say?" she said. "It was a very bad day. But my point is, that day is the source of my fame. That is why you know my name. But for me, it is a day steeped in horror and misery, and I would not wish it upon my worst enemy. Do you understand what I am saying?"
He closed his eyes, releasing a breath. "With all due respect, Lady Soryu -- and I assure you, that respect is considerable -- I am not asking your daughter to endure anything close to the hardships you have experienced. I merely hope that my instructors can help her realize her full potential. That is worthwhile, is it not? Not just for the sake of music as an art form, but for her own sake as well?"
She shrugged. "If I thought it would make her happy in the long run I'd force her hand, but I'm not convinced it will. She seems happy enough to play at school and at local clubs and such, and she learns from other musicians; she has no interest in becoming an icon. I don't understand her mindset at all; I've always wanted fame and recognition, and the fact she doesn't seem to care about those things is really weird to me. But she knows what she wants, and it's obvious she has different goals in mind."
He ran a hand over his face. "Lady Soryu, please, I beg you to reconsider. This girl, this woman . . . her potential is staggering. A talent such as hers comes along but once in a generation! Letting her squander that talent would be a crime against humanity!"
Asuka frowned. "Do you think I'm an idiot?" she asked. "I already know all of that. But as I said, I am her mother. Her happiness is my top priority. If she doesn't want to be a legend she doesn't, and that's all there is to it. The decision is hers to make, not mine, and certainly not yours. If humanity loses out in the process, too damn bad."
The man sighed. "She will regret her decision." He looked her in the eye. "As will you."
She shrugged. "Maybe," she admitted. "But better that than making her life a living hell for no good reason."
He stood, turning to leave, then turned back to her. "Thank you for the tea," he said. "It was excellent."
She nodded, and he left her office. She pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a heavy sigh. "Oh, Ryuko," she said, "I hope you know what you're doing."

That concludes the story(ies) at the time of copying to this forum.  This does not preclude the possibility of new chapters being added.

Cybermat47:
I really love this fanfic, it's really damn good. You could have gone the easy route and given Asuka and Shinji a completely happy ending, but instead, you stayed true to the characters - they still have many, many internal problems to deal with, as does everyone else who comes back.

You've written a story that is upsetting and uplifting in all the right areas, and I look forward to any future entries  :D

pwhodges:
This whole story is now available in a PDF with clickable index, for easier reading:

Ghosts of Evangelion (PDF)

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