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Evangelion / Re: Ghosts of Evangelion - a post-EoE fic by Bagheera
« on: 27 Jun 2017, 20:26 »
I said "playing the cello", didn't I? Whoops.
March 12, 2016
March 12, 2016
(click to show/hide)
March 12, 2016
Asuka awoke with a shout, clawing at her face as she fought to escape the dream's crushing grip. She was in the main living area of their apartment, with Shinji's futon right beside hers. She wrapped her arms around herself and doubled over, trying to calm herself.
Shinji watched her, weary and sympathetic. When she'd calmed a bit he asked, "That was the really bad one, wasn't it?"
"Yeah."
Shinji chewed his lip in indecision, then sat up. He slowly reached for her, then lay a hand on her back. He started to rub slowly.
"Don't grab me," she said.
"Sorry." He started to pull his hand away.
"No, it's fine," she said. "What you're doing is fine. Just don't grab me."
"O-okay."
Asuka scowled. "I used to want to be held more than anything, but now the very thought of it sickens me." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "God, I hate this."
"Me too," he said.
"What was yours about?" she asked.
"Misato's blood, and Lilith's eyes," he replied.
"One of your worst ones, huh?"
"Yeah."
Asuka tolerated his touch for a few more minutes, then squirmed a little to shake him off. He pulled his hand back. "What time is it?" she asked.
"It's after nine," he replied. "Would you like some breakfast?"
"I'm not hungry," she said.
Shinji gave her a worried look. "That's what you said yesterday, and you said it again when I asked about dinner. You need to eat, Asuka."
She scowled at him. "I'll eat when I'm hungry."
"That's not enough!" he exclaimed. "You need to keep up your strength--"
"Stop bugging me about it!" she snapped. "It's none of your business, so fuck off."
"It is my business!" he insisted. "What happens if you get sick from malnutrition or something? I don't know how to handle something like that!"
"Stop being such a worrywart," she scoffed. "Nothing like that's gonna happen."
He didn't reply for a bit, but eventually said "I don't want to be alone, Asuka. Please, try to eat something."
Asuka growled in annoyance. "Fine, I'll eat something. Now go away and stop bothering me."
He sighed. "Okay, fine. We need some supplies anyway, so I'll go look around or something."
"Whatever," she mumbled. "Good."
"Are you sure you're alright?" he asked.
She waved a hand in a shooing motion, dismissing him.
He let out a frustrated breath and stood, then grabbed his pack and headed out of the apartment. As he got to the door, she said "Shinji?"
"What is it?" he asked.
"Don't be gone too long, okay?" He recognized the fragile tone in her voice.
"I won't," he said, reassuringly. "I'll be back by early afternoon."
She nodded.
He opened the door and left.
As promised, Shinji returned in the early afternoon. Asuka turned to greet him, then stopped in her tracks when she saw what he was carrying. It was a cello, case and all. "Where the hell did you get that?" she asked.
"I found it in a wrecked music shop near the edge of town. It's in pretty good shape!" he said, proudly running a hand over his prize.
Asuka arched an eyebrow. "So you're saying you stole it, then."
Shinji blinked in confusion. "W-what?"
She smirked. "It doesn't belong to you, and you took it. What else would you call it?"
Shinji took a step back, shaking his head. "W-wait, it wasn't like that! There was no one there, and everything was wrecked --"
"--and the owner can come back at any time, and when he does he'll be down one cello because you took it. That's theft," she said with a shrug.
"I see," he said, crestfallen.
"Why'd you do it, anyway? You never seemed all that passionate about playing the thing."
"I thought you might like it if I played something," he mumbled.
She scoffed. "Oh yeah, right. Like some light music's gonna make everything better, eh?"
He grimaced. "Fine, I'll take it back." He turned toward the door.
"I didn't say you had to do that," she said, her tone dripping with condescencion.
He stopped. He paused a moment, then turned and glared at her. "Why do you have to be so mean all the time? I was trying to do something nice for you!"
Asuka stepped back, panic setting in. "Look, I was just saying--"
"I know what you were saying!" he shouted. "I already said I'm taking it back!"
"You don't--" she began.
"What am I supposed to do, Asuka? Nothing I try works, and you just keep getting mad, and --"
"Stop it!" she cried. "Please, stop."
He stopped.
She took a deep breath. "I shouldn't have said that, okay?" she said. "I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I really wasn't. I just . . . I didn't think it through."
"Whatever," he said, sulking. He turned toward the door again.
She tried again. "Shinji, wait."
He stopped, but didn't turn around. "What is it?"
She licked her lips, choosing her words carefully. "Those things need care, right? I mean, it's bad if you just leave them sitting around, isn't it?"
"Yeah."
"Well, we don't know when the owner's coming back. So what if you kept it here and left a note or something telling him where to find it? That way you'd be helping him out and you're just borrowing it."
He shrugged. "What's the point? I don't feel like playing anymore, and you don't want to hear it anyway."
"Shinji--"
"I'll be back later." He left without another word.
"Shit!" There were tears in her eyes when Asuka caught sight of herself in the mirror. "You stupid bitch," she spat. "Why do you keep doing that? What the hell is wrong with you?"
When Shinji got back Asuka was in the living room. Her eyes were red and she looked agitated.
"Are you still mad?" she asked.
He shook his head tiredly. "Not really. I just wanna get some sleep."
"I really wasn't trying to hurt you," she said, a pleading note in her voice.
"Okay," he said.
"And I'm glad you wanted to do something nice for me." Her voice was earnest.
He gave her a weak smile.
"I'm really trying not to be mean," she went on. "But everything's so fucked up . . . "
"Yeah." He lay down on his futon and closed his eyes.
"I don't know what to do either," she lamented.
"It's fine," he said. "Don't worry about it."
She fretted with her hands. "But it's not fine," she said quietly. "It's not fine at all."
He didn't respond, instead drifting off to sleep.
Asuka awoke with a shout, clawing at her face as she fought to escape the dream's crushing grip. She was in the main living area of their apartment, with Shinji's futon right beside hers. She wrapped her arms around herself and doubled over, trying to calm herself.
Shinji watched her, weary and sympathetic. When she'd calmed a bit he asked, "That was the really bad one, wasn't it?"
"Yeah."
Shinji chewed his lip in indecision, then sat up. He slowly reached for her, then lay a hand on her back. He started to rub slowly.
"Don't grab me," she said.
"Sorry." He started to pull his hand away.
"No, it's fine," she said. "What you're doing is fine. Just don't grab me."
"O-okay."
Asuka scowled. "I used to want to be held more than anything, but now the very thought of it sickens me." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "God, I hate this."
"Me too," he said.
"What was yours about?" she asked.
"Misato's blood, and Lilith's eyes," he replied.
"One of your worst ones, huh?"
"Yeah."
Asuka tolerated his touch for a few more minutes, then squirmed a little to shake him off. He pulled his hand back. "What time is it?" she asked.
"It's after nine," he replied. "Would you like some breakfast?"
"I'm not hungry," she said.
Shinji gave her a worried look. "That's what you said yesterday, and you said it again when I asked about dinner. You need to eat, Asuka."
She scowled at him. "I'll eat when I'm hungry."
"That's not enough!" he exclaimed. "You need to keep up your strength--"
"Stop bugging me about it!" she snapped. "It's none of your business, so fuck off."
"It is my business!" he insisted. "What happens if you get sick from malnutrition or something? I don't know how to handle something like that!"
"Stop being such a worrywart," she scoffed. "Nothing like that's gonna happen."
He didn't reply for a bit, but eventually said "I don't want to be alone, Asuka. Please, try to eat something."
Asuka growled in annoyance. "Fine, I'll eat something. Now go away and stop bothering me."
He sighed. "Okay, fine. We need some supplies anyway, so I'll go look around or something."
"Whatever," she mumbled. "Good."
"Are you sure you're alright?" he asked.
She waved a hand in a shooing motion, dismissing him.
He let out a frustrated breath and stood, then grabbed his pack and headed out of the apartment. As he got to the door, she said "Shinji?"
"What is it?" he asked.
"Don't be gone too long, okay?" He recognized the fragile tone in her voice.
"I won't," he said, reassuringly. "I'll be back by early afternoon."
She nodded.
He opened the door and left.
As promised, Shinji returned in the early afternoon. Asuka turned to greet him, then stopped in her tracks when she saw what he was carrying. It was a cello, case and all. "Where the hell did you get that?" she asked.
"I found it in a wrecked music shop near the edge of town. It's in pretty good shape!" he said, proudly running a hand over his prize.
Asuka arched an eyebrow. "So you're saying you stole it, then."
Shinji blinked in confusion. "W-what?"
She smirked. "It doesn't belong to you, and you took it. What else would you call it?"
Shinji took a step back, shaking his head. "W-wait, it wasn't like that! There was no one there, and everything was wrecked --"
"--and the owner can come back at any time, and when he does he'll be down one cello because you took it. That's theft," she said with a shrug.
"I see," he said, crestfallen.
"Why'd you do it, anyway? You never seemed all that passionate about playing the thing."
"I thought you might like it if I played something," he mumbled.
She scoffed. "Oh yeah, right. Like some light music's gonna make everything better, eh?"
He grimaced. "Fine, I'll take it back." He turned toward the door.
"I didn't say you had to do that," she said, her tone dripping with condescencion.
He stopped. He paused a moment, then turned and glared at her. "Why do you have to be so mean all the time? I was trying to do something nice for you!"
Asuka stepped back, panic setting in. "Look, I was just saying--"
"I know what you were saying!" he shouted. "I already said I'm taking it back!"
"You don't--" she began.
"What am I supposed to do, Asuka? Nothing I try works, and you just keep getting mad, and --"
"Stop it!" she cried. "Please, stop."
He stopped.
She took a deep breath. "I shouldn't have said that, okay?" she said. "I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I really wasn't. I just . . . I didn't think it through."
"Whatever," he said, sulking. He turned toward the door again.
She tried again. "Shinji, wait."
He stopped, but didn't turn around. "What is it?"
She licked her lips, choosing her words carefully. "Those things need care, right? I mean, it's bad if you just leave them sitting around, isn't it?"
"Yeah."
"Well, we don't know when the owner's coming back. So what if you kept it here and left a note or something telling him where to find it? That way you'd be helping him out and you're just borrowing it."
He shrugged. "What's the point? I don't feel like playing anymore, and you don't want to hear it anyway."
"Shinji--"
"I'll be back later." He left without another word.
"Shit!" There were tears in her eyes when Asuka caught sight of herself in the mirror. "You stupid bitch," she spat. "Why do you keep doing that? What the hell is wrong with you?"
When Shinji got back Asuka was in the living room. Her eyes were red and she looked agitated.
"Are you still mad?" she asked.
He shook his head tiredly. "Not really. I just wanna get some sleep."
"I really wasn't trying to hurt you," she said, a pleading note in her voice.
"Okay," he said.
"And I'm glad you wanted to do something nice for me." Her voice was earnest.
He gave her a weak smile.
"I'm really trying not to be mean," she went on. "But everything's so fucked up . . . "
"Yeah." He lay down on his futon and closed his eyes.
"I don't know what to do either," she lamented.
"It's fine," he said. "Don't worry about it."
She fretted with her hands. "But it's not fine," she said quietly. "It's not fine at all."
He didn't respond, instead drifting off to sleep.